- Chief Superintendent: Congratulations. You've got yourself a place at Cambridge University.
- Barry Grimes: Sir?
- Chief Superintendent: A promotion. Royal Protection Squad.
- Barry Grimes: You call that a promotion?
- Chief Superintendent: His Royal Highness starts at All Saints' College and we thought you'd be the ideal companion.
- Barry Grimes: Do I have a choice?
- Chief Superintendent: [sneers] What do you think this is - a free country?
- Mr. Garter: Mr Grimes, can I have a word? This fax came for you.
- [gleefully]
- Mr. Garter: Looks like you're being demoted. Reserve officer accompanying the young princesses on a tour of New Zealand.
- Barry Grimes: I *hate* children.
- Mr. Garter: [drily] I expect that's why they chose you.