- Annette Eick: I think in all of Berlin you were free, you could do what you wanted. We had three very well known clubs. One was in the north where proletarian girls came. Usually in their Sunday best costume, their smoking costume. I was a bit scarred, I must say. If you have never seen boyish and masculine lesbians and such a heap of them. I was surprised I had to get used to it. And funnily enough, I saw one woman which looked a little bit like Marlene Dietrich. I don't know. Anyway, I wanted to get to know her; but, she didn't care for me, of course. I was a silly little girl. But, she is the one I saw occasionally later on who saved my life. Because, she was the one who sent me this permit. She went to England before.
- Narrator: The Berlin Wall is only a memory now. The wartime generation is fading away. The country seems determined to create a shining vision of the future. But, a culture is also constructed of memories. Some loom large. Others are hidden.
- Heinz F.: Today, it's hard to imagine how wild it was in Berlin after the 1914 to 1918 war. Everything went topsy-turvy. Men danced together and so did women. In Berlin, those were the golden years.
- Pierre Seel: We lived in fear of war. I remember one speech I heard on the radio: "Do you want butter or guns?" And the people cried, "Guns!" And at that, my father became afraid.
- Albrecht Becker: The Nazis reigned at that time. And there was an officer, his name was Röhm, he was a homosexual man. Everybody knew it. But, the homosexual people were quite sure that nothing would happen; because, one of the government man was like them.
- Annette Eick: At first we didn't believe it. We laughed about him. That such a person like Hitler, that the people would stay behind him. Promises, promises. They believed it.
- Narrator: Aryan purity. Rescue the Fatherland from the shame of defeat. Unveil a glorious future. The Nazis set out to transform the nation into a unified fighting force.
- Narrator: While lesbians seemed to pose not threat, the Nazis saw male homosexuality as a contagious disease that corrupted and weakened the blood of the German people.
- Heinz F.: I went to the police and they showed me a letter. "Here, read this," they said. "Bavarian Political Police." What did that have to do with me? "You are suspected of being homosexual. You are hereby under arrest." What could I do? Off I went to Dachau, without a trial, directly to Dachau. I spent a hear and a half in Dachau without really knowing why.
- Pierre Seel: I wasn't even 18. Arrested, tortured, beaten. Without any defense, without trial. Nothing. I was all alone. I don't even mention begin sodomized, being raped. It happened in front of me and 300 prisoners, 300. 300. The death of Jo. My friend. He was condemned to die, eaten by dogs. German dogs, German shepherds.
- Gad Beck: We have to see this romantically, because in such drastic times one tends to be romantic. When bombs fall and explode nearby, one looks to others for closeness and one forgets the bombs, the war, and the stalled train. One is just close to others. One does what everyone does when they are close. That's what one does.
- Self - Historian: You're not going to tell me that while the bombs were falling you made love on the train?
- Gad Beck: But of course I did! But of course! You didn't get that? You are slow, darling. You are slow.
- Annette Eick: We call it the Yom Kippur Jews. They were not very religious, my family. But, we did hold the holy holidays. That's why we call ourselves the Yom Kippur Jews.
- Narrator: Lesbians were spared mass arrest. Researchers have uncovered no more than five cases of lesbian who were sent to Concentration Camps But, the social world they had created was destroyed. Some chose exile. Others married homosexual men. Most quietly disappeared from public view.
- Gad Beck: At that time, the transports began. Every day we said goodbye to someone. That's when I encountered the Jewish Zionist underground, that existed in this great capital, Berlin. Those who remained joined together, they understood, soon it would be their turn. I found them shelter. I even let them stay in my attic. I met this beautiful blond Jew. He invited me to spend the night. He said, "Let's play chess." We sat on his bed and we played chess. We did the other thing too, of course. We had to. Then we slept for a few hours. In the morning, the Gestapo came. They checked, he an his mother were on the list. I showed my ID - not on the list. They could have taken me. They took him and his mother to the train station and sent them to Auschwitz. It had a different value then, a night of love.
- Narrator: A pink triangle for homosexuals. A green triangle for criminals. Red for political prisoners. Black for asocials. Brown for Roma or Sinti, the so-called Gypsies. Purple for Jehovah Witnesses. And for Jews, a yellow triangle or the Star of David.
- Narrator: By 1942, the Final Solution marked Jews throughout Europe for extermination and transports began to death camps in occupied Poland. The official policy for homosexuals remained: reeducation. Since most were German Christians, almost all were spared the gas chambers. Instead, the Nazis selected them for slave labor, surgical experiments, or castration. Almost two-thirds perished in the camps.
- Heinz Dörmer: The singing forest. That gave us all goosebumps.
- Self - Historian: What was the singing forest?
- Heinz Dörmer: In the ground, there were holes. Concrete holes. Everyone who was sentenced would be lifted up onto the hook. In the Jewish barracks, it was similar. But they were twisted in addition to the hanging. That what was prepared for the Jews. The howling and screaming were inhuman. The singing forest. Inexplicable. Beyond comprehension. And much remains untold.
- Gad Beck: During that time I found my first big love, Manfred. It was like a dramatic love. Then one time, I went to spend the night at his house. His brother was there. "Where's Manfred?" He said, "Our whole family was arrested today." So I went to Manfred's boss. I say, "They've picked up Manfred. His whole family is being held in my old school building!" "Do you have courage?" he says, this great big German guy. "Yes, I have courage." He says, "My son is your size, he has a Hitler Youth uniform. Put it on and get Manfred out." I went in and said, "Heil Hitler! I must see the officer in charge." So this Gestapo guy says, "You'll bring him back, right?" I say, "What else? He's a Jew!" And I walk with Manfred out of my school building. After 20 or 30 meters, I still remember the exact spot, I gave him 20 marks. "Go to my uncle's place. I'll call him and meet you there later." He stops and he says, very calmly, "I can't come with you, Gad. If I leave my sick family now, I'll never be free again. I have to go with them. I'm the only strong one." Without saying goodbye, he turns around, and walks back, into my school building. I walked in the other direction. I wasn't able to think, but I knew that something was forever broken.
- Self - Historian: How long were you in concentration camps?
- Heinz F.: Altogether? I added it up once. I think eight and a quarter years.
- Self - Historian: What did you do when you got back?
- Heinz F.: When I came home? I worked in the family store that my brother was running. My father had already died.
- Self - Historian: Did you tell your brother or mother what happened in the camps?
- Heinz F.: I never spoke with my mother about it. I could have talked to my father, but...
- Self - Historian: Why not?
- Heinz F.: Shame. My mother never said anything. It's all about patiently carrying one's burden.
- Self - Historian: Shame, about what?
- Heinz F.: My mother? You mean my mother? Maybe it was from compassion, so she wouldn't offend me or make it even harder for me. Not even one word from her.
- Self - Historian: Today, it is hard to imagine, that you survived these horrible years, and came back and...
- Heinz F.: Couldn't talk to anybody about it? Yes, I never spoke to anyone about it.
- Self - Historian: Would you have liked to talk to someone?
- Heinz F.: Maybe, maybe with my father.
- [breaks down and cries]
- Self - Historian: And later, could you speak with others?
- Heinz F.: Never. Nobody wanted to hear about it. If you would just mention one of those words, "Leave me alone with this stuff. It's over now and done with." Now for me too - it's all over. In September, I'll be 93. Thick skin, no?