Andy Kaufman: Andy, the Robot

Quotes 

• Burglar : I got something you'll get a kick out of...

  [pulls a gun out of his satchel] 

  Vance Keefer : Oh yeah? Oh, wow! That-that's beautiful. Can I see it?

  Burglar : Sure.

  [hands him the gun] 

  Burglar : That's the old thirty-eight.

  Vance Keefer : Yeah.

  Burglar : You know anything about them?

  Vance Keefer : Oh yeah, yeah - police special; boom! That's ah, well they were made in nineteen thirty-eight.

  Burglar : It means thirty-eight caliber.

  Vance Keefer : That's ah, that's very nice. Nothing like an old-fashioned gun.

  [hands in back] 

  Burglar : Nothing like an old-fashioned stick up.

  Vance Keefer : What?

  Burglar : Get your hands up!

  Vance Keefer : Wait, wait, wait, hold it! Andy!

  Burglar : Where's the money?

  Vance Keefer : Listen, for your own good, I'm warning you: Andy here is a robot; he-he-he's incredibly strong. You-you can't even hurt him! He-he's bullit proof.

  Andy, the Robot : No I'm not.

  Vance Keefer : Now-now I'm warning you, I'm warning you, mister: he's quick, he-he's fast, he's brutal, he-he'll be on your in a second. Take him, Andy.

  [snaps his fingers] 

  Andy, the Robot : But, take him where?

  [turning around after being shoved at the burglar] 

  Vance Keefer : Do something!

  Andy, the Robot : Right! Ehhh, excuse me.

  [leaves to the back] 

  Burglar : Sure.

  Vance Keefer : Ah, Andy, Andy, wha-what are you doing?

  Andy, the Robot : Here's the money, mister.

  [handing him all the store's money] 

  Burglar : Is there anymore?

  Vance Keefer : No!

  Andy, the Robot : But what about the money in thee back, Vance? I get it. Excuse me.

  [leaves again for the rest of the money]