Grand Theft Auto III (2001 Video Game)

Dan Houser: British Business Man, Freddy, Donovan Nail Gun Commercial Host

Quotes 

• Freddy : When I was a boy in England, I had a nanny. She was very strict, Lazlow.

  [...] 

  Lazlow : How old is your son?

  Freddy : Excuse me?

  Lazlow : How old is your son?

  Freddy : I don't have children! I can't stand the little brats! But Freddy needs a nanny...

  Lazlow : Alright, that's enough of him! God, who gave this guy a green card?

• Caller : Wow, I got through! Uh, Lazlow, I think your last two callers are a perfect example of manners in this city! People are rude, and they don't seem to care about anything but themselves. Perfect example: the other day, I stopped at the store to pick up an exercise bar because I hadn't had breakfast or lunch. So I go up to pay, and the lady's like, "A dollar twenty-five please." So I get out my checkbook, and this guy behind me is like, "Oh come on lady, you don't have two dollars?" And I said, "As a matter of fact, I don't! I spent my last two dollars last night buying gas at these ridiculous gas prices. And besides, who are you anyway? Can't you see that I'm wearing my 'I walked for the cure' T-shirt?" People are so inconsiderate!

  Lazlow : Well, you'll get no argument from me. I mean, I get every inconsiderate moron in Liberty City calling into this show. I mean, people think that I have no feelings what-so-ever!

  Caller : Exactly! Another perfect example: the other day I'm over at the hospital to have my lunch with my girl friend Cherice, and this maniac comes right up on my bumper, flashing his lights, and I'm like, "Hey guy, the light is red, you can't just come up behind me honking and flashing your lights!" Then he gets over this megaphone and says, "To the woman in the teal Maibatsu Monstrosity, please move to the side!" Can you believe it? I mean, who has a megaphone hooked into their car? People are sooo obnoxious these days! And rude! I mean, I tell my nanny to teach my kids some manners.

  Lazlow : You know, I think that's a lesson to us all! All right, hello next caller, you're on Chatterbox.

  Freddy : Hello Lazlow...

  Lazlow : ...ugh...

  Freddy : ...did that woman say she was a nanny? Because Freddy needs a nanny because he's been a very naughty boy...

  Lazlow : *Nooo, no nannies*!