- Arthur: Coming out as a raging bloody queen at your age!
- Andy: What about *you*? Trying to shag a fifteen-year-old. Trying to shag *anything*! What about your wife? What about Megan?
- Arthur: Do you want to know? I haven't screwed my wife for two years. For *two* years! She doesn't want it and I don't want her.
- Andy: Well that's marriage.