- [talking about a murder victim who was found on a golf course]
- Dr. Paul Ashurst: There's evidence of three blows to the head with a sand wedge.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: [hearing "sandwich"] It must have been a bloody stale one!
- Dr. Paul Ashurst: A sand wedge is a type of golf club.
- Dr. Paul Ashurst: Yes, thank you, doctor. I *am* aware of that.
- [a murder victim was suffocated by having three golf balls inserted into his mouth]
- Dr. Paul Ashurst: Do you want to take these with you?
- [Ashurst holds up a plastic bag containing the three golf balls]
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: First time I've left an autopsy with the dead bloke's balls?
- Dr. Paul Ashurst: We did it all the time at med school.
- [after being acquitted of murder, Macer has just confessed and cannot be retried, but he has been arrested for conspiracy to pervert the course of justice in connection with the murder; ACC Stella Applegarth is also implicated]
- Det. Insp. Peter Pascoe: You've got a result, then, Andy. Took you 20 years.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: Yeah, but I've done Macer a disservice, haven't I, Stella?
- ACC Stella Applegarth: I think we should discuss all this later. The Chief Constable needs to be informed.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: Easy enough to confess when he'd aready been acquitted. Especially when he didn't do it. There was a bite mark on Ted's body when they found him. Nobody mentioned it in court. They were paid not to. Even Macer's lawyers didn't use it. Why wouldn't Danny want anyone to notice it? Because it wasn't his bite, was it? It was a woman's. Ted tried to squeeze money out of you, didn't he? You had to get rid of him. Hitting, pushing, biting - whatever it took. Only he fell downstairs and broke his neck. Was it an accident, Stella, or did you just see red? Danny tried to cover for you, pushing those billiard balls into Ted's mouth.
- ACC Stella Applegarth: You can't prove *any* of this.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: Modern policing, Stella. We've got the old evidence... and we've got this.
- [he produces her scarf which she had left behind when they had lunch recently]
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: You left a hair on Ted's clothes. I had them checked. DNA.
- ACC Stella Applegarth: It was an accident.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: [shouting] It was a crime! Four people are dead because of you and Macer. But d'you know what makes me *really* sick? What people are going to think of us. Every copper in the land's going to be tarred with the same brush. This...
- [he rips Stella's epaulette, denoting her rank, from her shoulder]
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: ...is supposed to mean something to you, you know? It means something to me. You tried to make out I was past it, didn't you? Do you still think I'm past it, ma'am? Wieldy!
- Det. Sgt. Edgar Wield: Sir
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: Take the ACC away. Preferably in a van.
- Det. Insp. Peter Pascoe: She's under arrest. Murder.
- Det. Sgt. Edgar Wield: After you, ma'am