User Reviews

For all the magical reasons that we love the old days of the video store, there was one drawback. Often, the movie that you wanted to rent just might be out of stock. So if you wanted to rent Rambo: First Blood Part II or Commando, there's a chance that every copy of that movie may be out. Yes, in the days of streaming, this may seem crazy to you, but you couldn't always get what you wanted.

But if you try sometimes, you just may find you get Ron Marchini.

A former U. S. Army drill sergeant, a survivor of a drive-by shooting, a martial arts tournament fighter said to be the best in the country in 1969 and the toughest opponent Chuck Norris ever faced - or so Black Belt Magazine would have us believe - Marchini appeared in a Murder in the Orient and New Gladiators before getting noticed in 1976's Death Machines, a film in which he played White Death Machine.

It would be nearly a decade before Ron became a VHS industry all to himself, working with directors like Charlie Ordoñez and Alan Roberts to hit the rental audience with movies like Forgotten Warrior, Omega Cop and Return Fire. They aren't good movies, but they're great for what they are. And it's always pretty amazing that in the midst of the jungle, Marchini chooses to always wear yellow t-shirts.

This film finds our hero - Steve Parrish is his name -in Central American but we all know it's the Philippines. Some rebels have kidnapped American Ambassador Porter Worthington and only our man Ron - or Steve - can come in and set things right. This was probably shot at the same time as Forgotten Warrior and even goes all Boogeyman 2 on us by recycling plenty of footage and using it as flashbacks.

The best part of a military 80s movie is when the hero gears up, covering himself in weapons before killing everything and everyone. This movie has that happen twice and it has the theme song play so many times that you'll swear it's the only audio in the entire movie. Also, the bad guy wears a pirate hat and our hero has a samurai sword and man, this movie is so ridiculous I kind of want to watch it again.

And that's pretty much all you'll get with this one, another extremely cheap war movie about a fictional South American country in revolution and dealing with guerrillas who kidnap the American ambassador, keeping him where all guerrillas hide their prisoners, in the jungle. Poor sound effects obviously from a synthesizer, where they got the music as well, dominating the film in addition to the back in action theme song that is repeated ad nauseum.

The cast isn't worth mentioning in the least because, a. Nobody's ever heard of them before or since, and b., they really don't do much but shoot off rifles or use them as battering weapons. For a film with practically no dialog, it's one of the noisiest movies I've ever seen, and one of the most pointless.

In the Central American nation of San Sebastian, a group of violent rebels kidnap the American Ambassador, Ambassador Porter Worthington (Carreon). (You know he's American because his name is Porter Worthington, so don't think he was played by a non-American actor). The leader of the group is Hernandez (Diaz), who sports some intimidating facial hair and has unpredictable taste in hats. He wants the release of the prisoner Isidro Zapien (Gamboa) and will use entire armies of armed men to achieve his goal. Naturally, the one man who can rescue the Ambassador and save the country is Vietnam vet Steve Parrish (Marchini). He teams up with the beautiful Maria (Abeyta) and heads off into the jungle to fight the baddies. But he's haunted by the ghosts of his past, especially as they relate to Forgotten Warrior (1986). Will he succeed? Confusingly, Jungle Wolf uses a lot of recycled footage from the aforementioned Forgotten Warrior, but both movies were released the same year, 1986. Seeing as how Ron has the same yellow shirt in both movies, it's safe to assume they were shot simultaneously, or at least very close together. This seems to be the beginning of his Steve Parrish character, who he played in at least four of his films. His son Zak (Nicholas) makes a brief appearance here, but the plot of Jungle Wolf II (AKA Return Fire, 1988) fleshes out the relationship a bit more. But technical details aside, Jungle Wolf takes the standard El Presidente/Jungle Slog so common in the 80's, and gives it the old Marchini magic. The movie is almost plot less and could be described as incoherent. But it's incoherent in a great way. As there seems to be no word to convey this idea, we'll pioneer a new one, grincoherent.

We're not sure if the grincoherence is helped or hurt by Marchini's unnecessary and deadpan narration, the character of Agent Connover (Vance) who looks exactly like Rick Moranis, and of course the constant machine gun shooting. The highlight of the movie is the fist-pumping song "Back In Action" by Michael Bristow (a frequent Marchini collaborator who has worked with him in various guises both in front of and behind the camera). It sounds like a cross between Europe and the Scorpions, which is funny because as far as we know Bristow is American and the song was recorded in California. But that doesn't stop Bristow from singing with a Klaus Meine-like accent. You gotta love it. When the song plays while Marchini changes into his all-black outfit (complete with horizontal pant-leg zippers) and gears up with guns and knives, you'll be in action movie heaven. Thankfully it happens twice in the movie.

Why the movie is set in Central America but was shot in the Philippines remains unknown, and sadly this particular Marchini outing was not released in America. Fans in the Netherlands got to enjoy it, and it wasn't until the advent of the internet that others could complete their Marchini collections. It was also the only Romarc movie not to be released here in the U.S. (that's Marchini's company, the word being a contraction of his first and last names). Lovers of low-budget and/or obscure action from the 80's, and of course Mr. Marchini, will likely get a charge out of Jungle Wolf. For casual viewers, it may be better to start elsewhere.