Ninja Nonsense (TV Series 2004– ) Poster

(2004– )

Sean Schemmel: Onsokumaru

Quotes 

  • Onsokumaru : What the hell are we, trash? I wanna take a bath! Shinobu! Kaede! Where are you?!

    Sasuke : Hey Onsokumaru, do you think we're burnable or non-burnable garbage?

    Onsokumaru : I'm pretty sure we'll burn.

    Sasuke : Huh.

  • Sasuke : Who goes there!? Huh, I could have sworn I heard someone.

    Onsokumaru : Heh. You fool, what do you take me for? If there had been someone outside, don't you think *I* would have noticed. I'll do a lap around Japan on a unicycle without a *seat* if I'm wrong.

    Sasuke : Seriously? That's great. I'll write up the contract.

  • Onsokumaru : Woo-hoo! Shop until you drop! Clothing accessories, illegal porn tapes and high school girls! So where do you think we should start?

    Sasuke : Hey, hey, hey! You're a little too happy. You're babbling about illegal purchases.

  • Shinobu : Hey now. Onsokumaru, stop bothering everyone. You're such a bad boy.

    Onsokumaru : Excuse me? Some breasts, a few sweet-and-sours kisses and a roomful of farts is *bad*? A *real* ninja must be prepared to face dangers such as these at all times.

    Kaede Shiranui : I so don't understand him.

  • Kaede Shiranui : You're *in* the way.

    Onsokumaru : *This* is where *we* always play baseball! Besides, girls shouldn't even be in sports. Except maybe as cheerleaders, eye candy or beer girls.

    Kaede Shiranui : What a tyrant. Unbelievable.

    Onsokumaru : Me, a tyrant? What an incredibly rude thing to say. To make it up to me, let me touch your boobs.

  • Onsokumaru : Stop laughin' will ya and just trust me. You'll live longer if you bathe with men.

    Miyabi : Really? Is that true, sis?

    Shinobu : Uh, is that true, Kaede?

    Kaede Shiranui : I've never heard of such a bizarre theory.

    Ninja 2 : Ah, yes ladies, it's quite true. We've even got a letter from the Surgeon General saying so. Actually, it's really from my uncle Kazuhiko whom everyone calls Pervyhiko and I'm not sure why, though.

  • Onsokumaru : Well, it appears that you leave me no choice. Round up the men. We're going to have a guys versus girls baseball game. We'll turn those insolent girls into squishy-wishy sobbing babies.

    Sasuke : All right! A new strike zone!

  • Ninja 1 : That's a homerun for the girl's team!

    Onsokumaru : Stop! Now wait just a minute here!

    Ninja 1 : What? You have a problem with my judgement as the umpire? Assistant umpire, *that's* a penalty.

    Ninja 3 : Yes sir!

    Ninja 2 : Well, look at this. It looks like the assistant umpire has made a stick to shove up his butt.

    Onsokumaru : Dah, those stubby branches look like they'd be incredibly comfortable but, uh...

    Ninja 2 : Onsokumaru does not look too pleased with that penalty.

  • Onsokumaru : What is this?

    Shinobu : Huh?

    Onsokumaru : I wonder what's in here.

    Kaede Shiranui : Hey! Leave it alone. That's the Christmas present I brought.

    Onsokumaru : Oh wow, ten kiss tickets! I see some deep and heavy smooching in my future. It's so dirty. It's so filthy. I had no idea this person was such a pervert. Here ladies, this is a present I'd like to give you.

    Kaede Shiranui : Yeah, yeah. Thanks but no thanks.

  • Shinobu : You're *amazing* Miyabi. You're so smart.

    Ninja 2 : Smarter than us.

    Onsokumaru : I knew that! I knew that! And there's something *else* I know. Men are pointy and women are soft. They like to purr and go 'Meow.' So here I come baby! Come and get some fresh milk! You want it!

    Ninja 1 : Really, because I always kind of thought that, too.

  • Onsokumaru : Hmm, what's that?

    Ninja 3 : Ow! Ah! That's my butt!

    Kaede Shiranui : It's been fun, but can you guys please leave now?

    Sasuke : Did you hear that, Onsokumaru? What a terrible order. I can't believe how rude she is.

    Onsokumaru : No, I couldn't understand her at all, actually. Apparently, this village only seems to speak the language of selfish priss.

  • Onsokumaru : You know, you're just as bad as the instant cup ramen leftovers that get stuck in the drain after I empty out the hot water.

    Sasuke : Really? That bad?

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs


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