- Salvador: Let me see if I'm following your delightful little story, you used to be a human and now you're a dog. That's brass to gold, baby. And you want to change back? What are you, cuckoo?
- Eddie McDowd: What can I say? I miss my fingers, and i was 3 weeks from away getting my driver's license. I gotta get out of here.
- Salvador: That is not going to happen until you get tagged.
- [Shakes his collar]
- Salvador: Listen, kid, they call my humans they pick me up. I do a little begging.
- [waves]
- Salvador: and I'm knee-deep in chew toys, baby.
- Eddie McDowd: I'm not begging anyone for anything. I'm Eddie McDowd, I don't beg, I take.
- Salvador: Keep talking like that and the only thing you'll be taking is a walk to the room.
- Eddie McDowd: This is humiliating. If anyone asks, I'm taking you for a walk.
- Justin Taylor: Fine. Fine! I'll talk you to my master, okay? But you're gonna have to scoop my poop.
- [sighs]
- Justin Taylor: I can't believe I owned a talking dog.
- Eddie McDowd: It's only temporary. I already told you about the creepy guy and the car and the hundred good deeds.
- Justin Taylor: Yeah, but I still don't get why I'm the only one who can hear you talk.
- Eddie McDowd: I think it's because I hung you from that flagpole.
- Justin Taylor: What?
- Eddie McDowd: By the way, you still got some white in your ear.
- Justin Taylor: You're Eddie McDowd?
- Eddie McDowd: In the fur.
- The Drifter: [Preparing his magic] All you cause is pain and strife, so now you're doomed to live a dog's life. A dog you'll be with fur and fleas, until you do 100 good
- [wiggles fingers]
- The Drifter: deeeeds!
- Salli: Let me see if I'm following your delightful little story, you used to be a human and now you're a dog. That's brass to gold, baby. And you want to change back? What are you, cuckoo?
- Eddie McDowd: What can I say? I miss my fingers, and I was 3 weeks from away getting my driver's license. I gotta get out of here.
- Salli: That is not going to happen until you get tagged.
- [Shakes his collar]
- Salli: Listen, kid, they call my humans they pick me up. I do a little begging.
- [waves]
- Salli: and I'm knee-deep in chew toys, baby.
- Eddie McDowd: I'm not begging anyone for anything. I'm Eddie McDowd, I don't beg, I take.
- Salli: Keep talking like that and the only thing you'll be taking is a walk to the room.