The Addams Family (TV Series)
Ophelia Visits Morticia (1966)
Jackie Coogan: Uncle Fester
Photos
Quotes
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Gomez Addams : Bye Fester, you can have my trains, blasting caps...
Uncle Fester : Oh, gee, thanks. For a minute there I was sorry to see you go.
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Gomez Addams : [reading from the Peace Corps manual] What is the first aid treatment for snake bite?
Uncle Fester : Oh, that's a cinch. You take the snake and wrap him in a nice warm blanket so he won't go into shock. Right?
Gomez Addams : It certainly is but that's not the answer they have here.
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Gomez Addams : [reading from the Peace Corps manual] The Peace Corps mission is to make friends. Now, what would you do if you were invited to a feast in a native village and were served such local delicacies as sautéed batwing, brisket of warthog and sweet-and-sour scorpion stew?
Uncle Fester : I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole. Ich! Whoever heard of mixing sautéed batwings and brisket of warthog?
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Wednesday Addams : [reading from the Peace Corps manual] Many of the countries low bele... below the equator, where the average rainfall exceeds 200 inches per year. What would you consider the people's greatest need?
Uncle Fester : Ha-ha. Umbrellas.
Wednesday Addams : Oh, Uncle Fester.
Uncle Fester : Canoes?