All in the Family (TV Series)
Gloria's Boyfriend (1974)
Carroll O'Connor: Archie Bunker
Photos
Quotes
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Archie Bunker : Let me ask you something there, about George. I mean, how did that happen to him? When he was a baby, uh, did somebody throw him up in the air and forget to catch him?
Mr. Bushmill : [sighs] It's a common birth defect. The doctors call it anoxia. It means he didn't get enough oxygen when he was born. Now that's what happened to George - what's your excuse?
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Michael 'Meathead' Stivic : You know, Arch, you oughta be in the Guinness Book of World Records? "Most Stupid Remarks Made in a Single Day"!
Archie Bunker : Nuts to you, buddy!
Mr. Bushmill : [Later] Let's get something straight, Bunker! My boy don't have to weave baskets, understand? He's gonna make it on his own, like his brother!
Archie Bunker : Ah, geez, you got another one like that?
Mr. Bushmill : It don't run in families, okay? As a matter of fact, George's brother just passed his bar exam!
Archie Bunker : Oh yeah? Where does he tend bar?
Michael 'Meathead' Stivic : You just broke your own record!
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Michael 'Meathead' Stivic : Arch, that's a myth. Retarded people have no more of a sex drive than anybody else.
Archie Bunker : Oh yeah? Then why are you on automatic all the time?
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Archie Bunker : Don't be funny.
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Archie Bunker : I'm making a raft so we can sail away.
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Archie Bunker : You're half right, he's just like you.
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Archie Bunker : It ain't nice to take tips.
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Archie Bunker : Being happy is just part of being crazy.
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Archie Bunker : Don't tell me about tools.