Angel (TV Series)

Slouching Toward Bethlehem (2002)

Charisma Carpenter: Cordelia Chase

Photos 

Quotes 

• Cordelia : That's everything? It all makes perfect sense now. I was a cheerleader, a princess and a warrior. And I have visions and super powers and I'm the target of an evil law firm because I've spent the last three months living on a higher plane, fighting for the forces of good, who wage a battle against demons and evilies and squishy bug babies, 'cause all that stuff's real and that's the world I live in. And-and I think I know why I don't remember any of this 'cause, hey who'd want to!

  Angel : I know it's a lot to take in.

  Cordelia : Says the vampire with a soul and his wacky gang of sidekicks.

  Charles Gunn : [Raises his hand]  Um, not a sidekick.

• Cordelia : [after beating up two guys]  Wow. How did I-?

  [beat] 

  Cordelia : I am a spy.

  [Angel sighs] 

  Cordelia : I get it now. You're all spies. Probably all Russian. And you've brainwashed me, and want me to believe we're friends so I'll spill the beans about some nano-techno-thingy that you want.

  Charles Gunn : So... I look Russian to you?

  Cordelia : Black Russian.

  Angel : That's a drink.

  Cordelia : Says the head spy.

• Angel : What do you remember?

  Cordelia : I don't know. Numbers. Animals. Flossing.

• Murray : [On the answering machine]  Uh, yeah, this is Murray, down at the spa. Listen, it's after midnight, and uh, you better get down here. That demon broad came back. Looks like she's gonna try and hatch her blood-sucking little...

  Winifred 'Fred' Burkle : [Grabs the phone]  We're here. Uh-huh. OK. We'll be right there.

  Cordelia : Did-he say "demon broad"?

  Winifred 'Fred' Burkle : Yeah. His, um, wife. It's an ugly divorce case thing. You know, private eye stuff.

  [Mouths "No it's not" to Angel] 

  Winifred 'Fred' Burkle : I should get Charles and terminate it before the situation multiplies.

  [Fred mimes giving birth behind Cordy's back] 

• Charles Gunn : Where you going?

  Cordelia : Out. Away. Does it matter?

  Winifred 'Fred' Burkle : But it's not safe.

  Cordelia : Oh, right, 'cause of evil ninja law firm.

  Charles Gunn : We'll come with, just in case.

  Cordelia : You keep telling me I was a higher being. Don't make me turn you into a rat.

  [slams door] 

  Charles Gunn : [Freaked out]  Can she do that?

• Charles Gunn : How 'bout a sandwich. Let's go to the kitchen.

  Winifred 'Fred' Burkle : We have cookies.

  Cordelia : I don't want a sandwich. I don't want cookies. I wanna talk to Angel, sans sidekicks.

  [Walks off] 

  Charles Gunn : I am not a sidekick.

• Cordelia : Your friends here were just talking about murdering children. And there's-there's-there's singing and blood and-and pointy things. And did I mention the singing? What the hell is going on here, Angie?

  Angel : Angel.

  Cordelia : Whatever.