- Daisy Moses: You can help us fight the War of the Roses.
- Jed Clampett: Now Granny.
- Jane Hathaway: Excuse me, but I think the War of the Roses has already been fought.
- Daisy Moses: No, it was supposed to be fought last year, but Sir Chicken here tucked his tail twixt his legs and run.
- Jed Clampett: I said it before and I'll say it agin. I ain't travelin' 6000 miles to scrap with the folks in the next castle.
- Customs Inspector: Every schoolboy has heard of the War of the Roses.
- Daisy Moses: See Jed, it's all over England that we run out on the feud. They've even got it in schoolbooks.
- Elly May Clampett: Sure am glad we brought the truck to London. It's dandy for sight-seein'.
- Daisy Moses: Yeah, and we're the sight everybody is seein'. You see how folks are starin' and pointin' at us. They know we run out on the feud.
- Jed Clampett: Now Granny.
- Jed Clampett: She's right, Uncle Jed. Ain't no other reason they'd be laughin' at us.
- Jed Clampett: Where are we, Jethro?
- Jethro Bodine: We is in what's called Hyde Park.
- Daisy Moses: Good! Pull up to them bushes and let's hide.
- Tetley: Excuse me, Mr. Faversham, sir. A group of gypsies is approaching the castle.
- John Faversham: Really?
- Tetley: Yes and they're driving a most disreputable-looking vehicle. These vagabonds are to spoil the arrival of the Clampetts.
- John Faversham: Mr. Tetley, those vagabonds ARE the Clampetts.