- Ranger Mark: Which one of you is Feeney's grandson?
- Cory Matthews, Shawn Hunter: [at the same time, pointing at each other] He is.
- Cory Matthews: Well, I am.
- Shawn Hunter: We both are.
- Cory Matthews: We're brothers.
- Shawn Hunter: We're cousins... brother... cousins.
- Ranger Mark: No need to explain, son. I'm from mountain people myself!
- Ranger Mark: I gotta go. I'm watching a video with my buddy, Moose.
- Cory Matthews: Oh is that a ranger friend of yours?
- Ranger Mark: A moose can't be a ranger!
- Joseph 'Joey the Rat' Epstein: You couldn't hit the broadside of the barn if it came up to you and said, "Hey! I'm the broadside of a barn! Hit me!"
- Eric Matthews: So how does it feel to be dating a winner?
- Bianca: I'll let you know as soon as I find one.
- Cory Matthews: Aight, Shawn, not to put a damper on our plans or anything, but it occurred to me in a moment of clarity that WE DON'T SKI!
- Shawn Hunter: Hey, we don't learn, but we go to school, don't we?
- Shawn Hunter: Well, that was the worst two hours of my life. I can't believe the ski lodge was closed.
- Cory Matthews: Yeah, you'd think Ranger Mark might have mentioned the little fact that there's no one else on the mountain!
- Shawn Hunter: There wasn't even any snow.
- Cory Matthews: Yeah, what about that, Shawn? You told me the weather report said snow in the mountains.
- Shawn Hunter: They did. They said the Rocky Mountains were blanketed with fresh powder.
- Cory Matthews: The Rockies? Shawn, we're in the Poconos! Two-thousand miles away from the Rocky Mountains!
- Shawn Hunter: Oh, you mean that's a name? I thought it was a description. You know, like, "chewy nougat".