- Greg Brady: [looking at the broken vase] Mom's favorite vase.
- Bobby Brady: She always said, don't play ball in the house.
- Alice Nelson: [notices the vase uncontrollably spraying water at the dinner table] Anybody got three coins for the fountain?
- Carol Brady: [noticing the kids are fixed on watching the vase and not eating dinner] Will you kids stop daydreaming? Why aren't you eating?
- Jan Brady: [nervously] It's just that it's so good, we want to make it last.
- Mike Brady: [he and Carol are trying to control the water spraying from the vase] You know, I don't recollect this vase having cracks in it, when your mother bought it.
- Carol Brady: Obviously it's been broken and glued back together.
- Mike Brady: The question is, WHO broke it and WHO glued it together?
- [he and Carol angrily stare at the kids, who are frantically eating and drinking milk]
- Mike Brady: Your mother and I expect an answer... after dinner.
- Mike Brady: [he and Carol go into the family room to meet with the kids] Well, one of you broke your mother's vase, but five of you claimed you did it.
- Carol Brady: There seems to be a slight communication gap in this family.
- Mike Brady: Look, no matter who broke it, the rest of you are as guilty for hiding the truth, and I'm afraid you're all going to have to be punished.
- Jan Brady: But when people admit their guilt, aren't they committed to a lighter sentence?
- Mike Brady: Well, that's not up to me, Jan.
- Greg Brady: [confused] What do you mean, Dad?
- Mike Brady: In this case, your punishments are not going to be decided by your mother or by me.
- Carol Brady: They'll be decided by a jury of one... your brother, Peter.
- [Peter looks up in shock]