- Xander Harris: Okay, let's not say something we'll, uh, regret later, okay?
- Cordelia Chase: You crazy freak!
- Buffy Summers: Vapid whore!
- Xander Harris: Like that.
- Lyle Gorch: I'm gonna kill both you Slayers for this! You hear me?
- Cordelia Chase: I hear you, you redneck moron. You got a dress that goes with that hat?
- Lyle Gorch: I'm gonna...
- Cordelia Chase: Rip out my innards, play with my eyeballs, boil my brain and eat it for brunch? Listen up, needle-brain. Buffy and I have taken out four of your cronies, not to mention your girlfriend.
- Lyle Gorch: Wife!
- Cordelia Chase: Whatever. The point is, I haven't even broken a sweat. See, in the end Buffy is just the runner-up. I'm the queen. You get me mad, what do you think I'm gonna do to you?
- Lyle Gorch: [thinks for a second] Later.
- [he walks away without turning his back on her]
- Cordelia Chase: After all that we've been through tonight, this whole who-gets-to-be-queen capade seems pretty...
- Buffy Summers: Damn important.
- Cordelia Chase: Oh, yeah.
- Buffy Summers: I just thought... Homecoming Queen. I could pick up a yearbook someday and say, "I was there." I went to high school. I had friends. And... for one moment, I got to live in the world. And there'd be proof, proof... that I was chosen for something other than this... Besides...
- [racks her gun]
- Buffy Summers: I look cute in a tiara.
- Xander Harris: Buffy and Faith are in the library gettin' all sweaty.
- Cordelia Chase: They're training.
- Xander Harris: I stand by my phrase.
- Buffy Summers: Ah, it's okay. Gave Cor and I a chance to spend some quality death time.
- Cordelia Chase: And we got these free corsages.
- [Buffy and Cordelia arrive at the Homecoming Dance disheveled and dirty]
- Xander Harris: Oh, God! What did you two do to each other?
- Buffy Summers: Long story.
- Cordelia Chase: Got hunted.
- Buffy Summers: Apparently, not that long.
- Mr. Trick: Competition is a beautiful thing. It makes us strive. It... makes us accomplish. Occasionally, it makes us kill. We all have the desire to win, whether we're human... vampire... and whatever the hell you are, my brother. You got them spiny-looking head things. I ain't never seen that before.
- Rupert Giles: We have to find Buffy. Something terrible's happened.
- [Willow and Xander stare at him]
- Rupert Giles: [smiles] Just kidding. Thought I'd give you a scare.
- Buffy Summers: We are gonna get out of here, and we are gonna head back to the library, where Giles and the rest of the weapons live. Then I'm gonna take out the rest of these guys just in time for you to congratulate me on my sweeping victory as Homecoming Queen.
- Cordelia Chase: I know what you're up to. You think if you get me mad enough, I won't be so scared. And, hey... it's *working*! Where's a damn weapon?
- Cordelia Chase: Why is it every time I go somewhere with you, it always ends in violence and terror?
- Buffy Summers: Welcome to my life.
- Cordelia Chase: [about the corsages] Oh, God, get rid of these things!
- Buffy Summers: [to Giles] I need some wet toilet paper.
- Cordelia Chase: [sarcastically] Yeah, that'll help.
- Buffy Summers: You really love Xander?
- Cordelia Chase: Well, he kinda grows on you, like... a Chia Pet.
- [first lines]
- Cordelia Chase: I think we should get a limo.
- Xander Harris: A limo?
- Cordelia Chase: Yeah.
- Xander Harris: A big, expensive limo?
- Willow Rosenberg: That sounds like fun. And it is our last Homecoming Dance, so maybe we should make a big deal out of it.
- Xander Harris: You wanna talk fun? Public bus. You meet the funnest people. Back me up here, Oz.
- [last lines]
- Michelle: I'm just so honored! I can't believe it! I mean, that you would pick me, or us, out of every girl in the whole school! It's just... It's so wonderful! I promised myself I wasn't gonna cry.