Danger Theatre (TV Series)

An Old Friend for Dinner (1993)

Diedrich Bader: The Searcher

Quotes 

• The Searcher : Now, what can you tell me about the abduction?

  Effie Conklin : Well, the police believe it's the work of that copycat serial cannibal, Meyer the Fryer.

  The Searcher : Ahh!... Who?

  Edgar Conklin : You know - the one who patterns himself after that monster, Andre the Gourmet.

  The Searcher : Of course! Andre the What?

  Effie Conklin : The Gourmet - he's the most notorious cannibal serial killer of all time!

• The Searcher : Now I have him right where he doesn't want me - on his trail.

• Andre the Gourmet : How did you find me here?

  The Searcher : You led me here, Andre the Gourmet. You outsmarted yourself by getting in my brain.

  Andre the Gourmet : That's not a brain, that's some sort of wind-up toy.

  The Searcher : Well, I wound up here, big shot.

• [during end credits] 

  The Searcher : Why do I suddenly have a craving for pot roast?

• Andre the Gourmet : I'm going to put a stick up your behind, freeze you and eat you like a popsicle and there's not a thing you do to stop me.

  The Searcher : I can think of one thing.

  Andre the Gourmet : What's that?

  [the Searcher knocks Andre out with one punch] 

  Meyer the Fryer : You beast! You monster! You hit Andre the Gourmet!

  The Searcher : [to the audience]  Well, it was either that or the stick.