Danger Theatre (TV Series)

Searcher in the Mist/Sex, Lies & Decaf (1993)

Diedrich Bader: The Searcher (segment "Searcher in the Mist")

Quotes 

• The Searcher : What seems to be the problem?

  Dr. Karen Kreiger : Testanine has a contract with the United States government to do research in animal behavior modification. We teach animals to be assassins.

  The Searcher : Whatever happened to the good old days when we just taught them to fetch?

• Dr. Karen Kreiger : Cookie was being trained to assassinate Saddam Hussein. Unfortunately, the training wasn't complete - we only got as far as the mustache.

  The Searcher : Hmm, that is a problem - especially for people with mustaches.

• The Searcher : [speaking to a rabbit]  Hello, Brucie. I used to have a bunny rabbit when I was a boy

  [holds up a rabbit's foot] 

  The Searcher : ... only his name was Mr. Snookie. I know you'd be great friends.