"The Dick Van Dyke Show" Racy Tracy Rattigan (TV Episode 1963) - Dick Van Dyke as Rob Petrie

Rob Petrie : Morning, Sal.

Sally Rogers : Ah, shut up!

Rob Petrie : Out with Herman last night again, huh?

Sally Rogers : Yeah, how could you tell?
Rob Petrie : What do you suppose is keeping Sally?

Buddy Sorrell : Well, I dunno. I guess it takes a long time to take off fifteen pounds.
Rob Petrie : Tracy, this is Laura, my wife.

Tracy Rattigan : Is this foul news the truth?

Laura Petrie : That's right. I'm his husband.

Rob Petrie : She means I'm her wife.
Laura Petrie : You DID give him the right directions, I hope.

Rob Petrie : Yeah. East Side Highway, Browns River Parkway, you know.

Laura Petrie : Darling, why didn't you tell him to take the West Side Highway? It's much more direct.

Rob Petrie : Yeah, but the East Side Highway is ten minutes faster.

Laura Petrie : Yeah, but twice as devious. There's much more chance he'll get lost.

Rob Petrie : [laughing] Yeah, I know that.
Tracy Rattigan : You cad! You ruined my joke!

Rob Petrie : Well, better your joke than your suit, eh, Tracy?
Rob Petrie : Honey, have you got a looser dress?
Rob Petrie : You were just putting me on? You weren't serious?

Tracy Rattigan : That's something you'll never be quite sure about, will you, old lovie?

Dick Van Dyke: Rob Petrie