The Dick Van Dyke Show (TV Series)

Will You Two Be My Wife? (1963)

Ray Kellogg: Captain

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Rob explains he wants the first of two three-day passes for his honeymoon] 

  Captain : Why do you want another one?

  Rob Petrie : Well, sir, I have to go back to Danville, Illinois, to tell my OTHER fiance that I can't marry her too.

  Captain : Oh. I see. You want to get rid of the girl back home, huh?

  Rob Petrie : Well, no. No, sir. Not exactly. I... She's, uh... Well... yeah, I... more or less.

  Captain : I'm sorry, Petrie. One three-day pass is IT.

  Rob Petrie : But-but, sir...

  Captain : And you can either use it for your honeymoon or you can go back to Danville and do the manly thing. Now it's your choice.

  Rob Petrie : Well, sir, I-I don't know what to do!

  Captain : I know what I'D do. I'd tell that girl back home.

  Rob Petrie : Oh, sir, would ya? It'd mean so much more coming from a captain.