Quotes
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Turtle : I'm on ass patrol. I got a six-pack, one of them kinda looks like Kristen.
Eric : What are you, an asshole?
Turtle : I'm just saying, revenge fuck.
Eric : What, I'm gonna revenge fuck someone 'cos she kinda looks like my ex?
Turtle : Fuck, I would. More importantly, this girl told me she loves to give head. Since I know you desperately need it, I'm gonna make sure she gives it to you.
Eric : Yeah, I'm sure a girl told you she loves to give head too, right?
Turtle : After I told her I love Derek Jeter, then she told me that.
Johnny "Drama" Chase : [as very striking girl comes down the stairs] Legally Blonde, two o'clock.
Turtle : [this girl happens to be actress Ali Larter] Boy, here she comes.
Ali Larter : Where's Vince? I can't find him anywhere.
Turtle : I don't even think he came tonight, Ali.
Ali Larter : Do not fuck with me, Turtle. Just tell me where he is.
Eric : Are we gonna do this again tonight?
Ali Larter : [nods impatiently] Go fuck yourself, Eric.
[turns, leaves]
Johnny "Drama" Chase : What are you mad at me? I didn't do anything.
Turtle : Come on, let's go, these girls are hot. They won some KROQ contest. Now they wanna party. But first they wanna meet Vince. You gotta hook that shit up.
Eric : Can you get laid without Vince? That's the question.
Turtle : Do I give a fuck? That's the answer.