Family Guy (TV Series)

Jungle Love (2005)

John Viener: Chief Oleki

Quotes 

• Peter Griffin : Hey, uh, you gots got an ATM? I only got $37 on me.

  [the villagers all gasp and bow to him] 

  Peter Griffin : What's the matter with them?

  Chieftain : We've never seen that much money before. You are the richest man in the country.

  Peter Griffin : Richest man in the country? Wow, no Griffin's been this powerful since my ancestor, King Arthur Griffin.

  Princess : [cutaway]  Oh, Arthur, if you are able to draw the sword from the stone and prove to me you truly are the sole king of Camelot, I will make love to you right here in the clearing.

  King Arthur Griffin : What if I could just move it an inch, will you touch me?

• Chieftain : Hello. I am Chief Oleki. Welcome to my village. Our air is clean, our food is bountiful, and our water is caffeine-free. Never had it...

  [triumphant laugh] 

  Chieftain : Never will. This is my daughter, Loca. My son, Hidalgo, and my cousin Vinny.

  Joe Pesci : Hey, how you doin'? Give me a word, any word at all, and I'll pronounce it funny for a nickel.

• Chris Griffin : [Peter has the villagers re-enact an episode of "Seinfeld"]  Dad, I have had enough of you taking advantage of these people. For God's sakes, the woman playing Elaine is a high priestess!

  Peter Griffin : I don't have to take that from you. I'm the richest guy in town!

  Chris Griffin : Dad, don't you see? This is a wonderful place, and you're just using it to escape from your problems at home.

  Peter Griffin : What do you mean? Meg's right there.

  Lois Griffin : But, Chris, honey, aren't you doing the same thing?

  Chris Griffin : What do you mean?

  Lois Griffin : I mean you just came here because you were being picked on at school. You're using these people to escape your problems.

  Chris Griffin : Oh, my God! You're right. I married this 11-year-old girl for all the wrong reasons! I'm sorry, Loca. I guess I just came here because I was afraid of being a freshman.

  Chieftain : Freshman?

  Chris Griffin : [the villagers start chasing them]  I guess you can't run away from your problems anywhere!

  Peter Griffin : [running toward a docked seaplane]  Jock, start the engine! Get the plane up!

  [as they run toward the water a la "Raiders of the Lost Ark," the plane starts up and they all manage to get aboard] 

  Brian Griffin : Uh, Peter, I think we forgot Meg.

  [standing on the edge of the water, Meg falls over, revealing a number of blowdarts in her back]