"Fantasy Island" Surrogate Mother/The Ideal Woman (TV Episode 1984) Poster

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5/10
A disturbing finale with some very lewd topics, whose tawdry stories are barely a 2/10 but good to see these actor for a final time on the island
imdb-252883 May 2023
So tonight, I decided to watch the finale, out of order. Funny, John Saxon was in "Surrogate Father" and I thought this was it, but it's "Surrogate Mother". It's bittersweet for me, and mitigated by the fact that it's not the end: I still have several episodes left to watch of the last 2 seasons (plus rewatch those I caught on TV, since they edit a lot of stuff out that leaves the show making little sense!), and it was fun seeing well loved actors acting together; namely:

John Saxon seemed like he was "phoning it in" and would rather have been somewhere else. He was just going through the motions, at this point, without much conviction. Juliet Mills, well with Saxon's censored past and she seemed to be recreating the unspoken parts of her own forbidden marriage. But enough about that.

Charo was a suprise. No more 'cuchi cuchi' here. Not only that, she wasn't wearing her customary sexy getups. She was a lot more tame and went for a dramatic role. She did alright, and it was nice to see her playing her beloved guitar, in a couple scenes. Her hair was dark ginger, and not her most flattering color, plus they dressed her in a medium blue that clashed a bit with that coloring.

I didn't like this story, though I enjoy these actors: even Mr. Roarke seemed bothered by the degeneracy of the topic. (I didn't know they had "surrogates" back in 1984!) Oh what a tangled web we have weaved. What was completely degenerate was being normalized already in this show. FFWD 40 years later, and we have millions of these NPCs, adults without a soul roaming the Earth. (And they still have no idea the monsters they've created, never mind we see these Village of the Damned adult kids day in and day out on the news, and no one can put 2 & 2 together, here!)

The other story didn't fare much better: Mr. Roarke condoning the cheating of her fiance', to the woman who is upset about seeing him kiss another woman. Yeah, this was out there, and out of character for Mr. Roarke. I want to rate this a 6/10 because the actors played their parts well, for the most part, but the topics here really sank bargain basement low! Yeah, ending on a "WTF" note but might as well end it right then and there, if that was where the show was headed!

Tattoo was sorely missed. None of his antics, none of his fun mispronunciations. No "highlights" from me, for this botched non finale (they wrapped up nothing, and didn't say their proper goodbyes to the viewers, so they most likely didn't know they were cancelled or the prods just didn't care any longer, at that point!) A lot of talk about "love" but it was more of a tainted love here, trying to conceal, again, the debasement of the loony topics.

It's not a bad finale production wise, but it's a bad, bad finale storywise. And idiot fighting between the women, a lot of gratuitous T&A. The only good thing was the denouement of that contest, and why the men reacted the way they did at the end, considering how hard they had pushed for a different outcome. The stories are barely a 2/10 but I'll up this to a 5 6/10.
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2/10
Last Show of the Series for a reason. ugh
mikeholmes-4801213 November 2015
Warning: Spoilers
Total crap fest here. where do i start.

So its a Charo Episode. I'd like it know for the record that all i know about Charo is she goes Goochy Goochy Goo and wiggles her boobs and was on Hollywood Squares a lot in the late 80's. I recently learned a few months ago looking up another episode she was in , that she was a big thing in the late 70's but got over exposed. So in this episode , she looked horrible and was pregnant and was to give surrogate birth for another couple. things i found odd were she didn't drink cause she was pregnant (didn't know they knew that back then) her nose looked Michael Jackson-ish, She still found a way to have a scene playing a Spanish guitar and she somehow had money to pay for fantasy (maybe they explained it, I was drinking beer and watching Its a Mad Mad Mad world previously). I also noticed the mother who couldn't give birth spoke British accent. I never noted but has every visitor to fantasy island been American or no accent? hmmmm.. so anyhow it was a stupid story line and they go at the end when she gives birth "did you forget, this is a fantasy of what would happen if you give birth" so i guess shes cool with giving away the kid and going through labor again at a later date. so Do over. The husband looked like this bartender Jeff i knew, total jerk, got mad when you ordered something cause he had to do something.

Anyhow , other story was just confusing. Unlike Charo, some guy had not enough money to pay for a fantasy but wanted a chic i think. But first to pay off his fantasy he had to do something, i think it was judging a Queen of Fantasy Island show. So first he meets these two guys who Rourke tells him they have fantasies as well and for his payment he has to help them. i was like Oh no , but then the men started describing women they wanted. I was like " oh good this isn't going how i was fearing". So then there was this mannequin and a block of marble. and somehow they were turned into women. As expected the mannequin turned into a blond and the block of marble a brunette. So the two guys make out with them and are really happy but the other guy is sad.

SO the sad guy finds out his ex fiancée is on the island. they talk, shes with some dude she left him for, hes mad she poses naked, shes like its cool , hes like its not, they fight. then the blond who used to be a mannequin , or was it hte ex marble block, goes up to him and seriously flirts with him. that makes his ex jealous and thus she likes him. but hes still a jerk cause he didn't like her posing nude for magazines and artists.

So he goes to his bungalow and the brown haired ex marble wall is there and she s on his bed and looks so hot. I m just like yelling "Do her, your on fantasy island" and he gives in and makes out with her, i think he did her though the scene cutting makes it unclear. Then hes with the Blond but shes dancing and that was lamer than a brunette on your bed. Then he gets slapped in one of the cheesiest slaps and reactions i ever seen, then his ex really wants him but still wants to pose, then the boyfriend of one of those chicks flashes a gun saying he wants her to win the Queen of Fantasy island contest, a highly sought after award that is presented in front of 30 people. then he picks his ex to win and is shown the other 2 ex mannequin and marble chicks who don't seem to care cause as Rourke says, they in love with those guys. I thought it seemed more like they were drunk and just didn't care but i digress.

Anyhow for whatever reason, those two guys went to fantasy island, got their dream girls who were manufactured out of mannequins and marble blocks and no problem, with help from a guy who couldn't afford it , and with a lady who was having a surrogate baby who had a choice of do that and support family or live your own life.

it is good this was the last episode.
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