Father Ted (TV Series)

The Plague (1996)

Jim Norton: Bishop Len Brennan

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Ted answers the phone] 

  Bishop Len Brennan : Crilly, It's me.

  Father Ted Crilly : Oh feck!

  Bishop Len Brennan : What?

  Father Ted Crilly : Who ees thees? Zere is no Creely 'ere.

  [Ted hangs up] 

  Father Ted Crilly : God almighty! I just said "feck" to Bishop Brennan!

  Father Dougal McGuire : Oho! He won't like that!

  Father Ted Crilly : It might be alright though. I disguised my voice so he'd think he dialled the wrong number.

  [the phone rings, Ted picks it up] 

  Bishop Len Brennan : Crilly.

  Father Ted Crilly : Ah, Bishop Brennan. I think you must have got the wrong number when you called there.

  Bishop Len Brennan : Shut up, Crilly, just shut up!

• Bishop Len Brennan : And you have...?

  Father Ted Crilly : Ah, yes. The rope. I'd like to see him chew through this... Again.

• Bishop Len Brennan : You address me by my proper title, ya little bollocks!

• Bishop Len Brennan : What would the following words suggest to you: "Jack", "sleepwalking" and "bollock naked"?

• Bishop Len Brennan : Um... Crilly what is this?

  [Points to big pile of rabbit droppings on the floor] 

  Father Ted Crilly : That's um... Caviar.

  Bishop Len Brennan : Caviar?

  Father Ted Crilly : Yes, well it's not everyday we have a bishop around, so we thought we'd get the Caviar out.

  Bishop Len Brennan : Right so what you've done is, you've spread some Caviar down there so i can get on my hands and eat it off the floor.

  Father Ted Crilly : ...Yes

• Bishop Brennan : What would the following words suggest to you: "Jack", "sleepwalking" and "bollock naked"?

• Father Dougal McGuire : Ted! Did Len find the rabbits?

  Bishop Len Brennan : What did he say?

  Father Ted Crilly : Well er...

  Bishop Len Brennan : Did he call me Len again?

  [shouts downstairs] 

  Bishop Len Brennan : You address me by my proper title you little bollocks!

  Father Dougal McGuire : Sorry er... Father Len Brennan.