- [after Fred receives a telegram]
- Wilma Flintstone: Don't read it, Fred. Telegrams are bad news.
- Fred Flintstone: What? Why, that is the silliest thing I ever heard of. Where did you get that idea?
- Wilma Flintstone: Mama always said...
- Fred Flintstone: [mimics] "Mama always said. Mama always said." Oh, that's a hot one. Now, if you and your mother don't mind, I'll read my telegram.
- [reads the telegram]
- Fred Flintstone: Oh, no!
- Wilma Flintstone: I knew it, I knew it. Like Mama always said.
- Fred Flintstone: My rich uncle, Tex Hardrock, is coming to visit us.
- Wilma Flintstone: Oh, dear, I knew it would be bad news. Hey, wait a minute, that's good news.
- Fred Flintstone: No, it isn't. It's bad news. Here, read it.
- Wilma Flintstone: [reads telegram] "Dear favorite nephew: Arriving tomorrow to visit you and your wife. I'm anxious to meet my namesake Little Tex. Signed, Big Tex." Who's Little Tex, Fred?
- Fred Flintstone: That's the bad news. There is no Little Tex.
- Wilma Flintstone: What are you talking about?
- Fred Flintstone: Well, to, uh, get on the good side of my rich uncle, I, um, I told him we named our baby after him.
- Wilma Flintstone: But we have no baby.
- Fred Flintstone: I know that, but we gotta get one before Uncle Tex arrives tomorrow.
- Wilma Flintstone: Oh, come now, Fred. The very soonest we could poss...
- Fred Flintstone: I'm talking about a loaner. A rental baby. Wilma, if there's no Little Tex here when Big Tex arrives, I am disinherited.
- Wilma Flintstone: See? Mama was right.
- [Fred arrives home pushing a baby carriage]
- Fred Flintstone: Sorry to be gone so long, but old Freddy boy did it again. Our troubles are over.
- Wilma Flintstone: What are you talking about? Where'd you get that carriage?
- Betty Rubble: And where's Barney?
- Fred Flintstone: Girls, I want you to meet the latest addition to our family... Little Tex Flintstone.
- [Barney, dressed as a baby, appears in the carriage shaking a rattle]
- Barney Rubble: [with a baby voice] Goo-goo!
- [Betty and Wilma faint in shock and Fred and Barney try to revive them]
- Fred Flintstone: Come on, Wilma. Open your eyes, sweetheart. See? It's me, Fred.
- Wilma Flintstone: [wakes up] Fred. Oh, oh, yeah. Fred.
- Barney Rubble: Hey, hey, Betty, wake up, wake up. Look, it's me.
- [Betty wakes up, but after seeing Barney still dressed as a baby, she screams and faints again]
- Barney Rubble: Uh-oh. B-Betty's out again, Fred.
- Wilma Flintstone: Aaah! There's that thing again!
- [Wilma, too, faints again]
- Fred Flintstone: Barney, will you shut up and go in the house so I can get them on their feet.
- Store Clerk: Uh, good afternoon, gentlemen. Can I help you?
- Fred Flintstone: Uh, I'm interested in looking at a life-like baby doll.
- Barney Rubble: Yeah, a boy doll.
- Fred Flintstone: He's gotta talk, walk, and go to sleep.
- Store Clerk: Oh, I've got just the doll for you. He walk, talks, and goes to sleep. Watch.
- [the clerk activates the baby boy doll]
- Baby Doll: Mama. Daddy. Mama. Daddy. Mama. Daddy. Mama.
- Fred Flintstone: Uh, what do you think, Barney?
- Barney Rubble: Well, I think he wants his mom and daddy.
- Fred Flintstone: I mean, will it fool Uncle Tex?
- Barney Rubble: Well, uh, how's Uncle's eyesight?
- Fred Flintstone: Good.
- Barney Rubble: Then it won't fool him.