Frasier (TV Series)
Seat of Power (1994)
David Hyde Pierce: Dr. Niles Crane
Photos
Quotes
-
Frasier : You know the expression, "Living well is the best revenge"?
Niles : It's a wonderful expression. I just don't know how true it is. You don't see it turning up in a lot of opera plots. "Ludwig, maddened by the poisoning of his entire family, wreaks vengeance on Gunther in the third act by living well."
Frasier : All right, Niles.
Niles : "Whereupon Woton, upon discovering his deception, wreaks vengeance on Gunther in the third act again by living even better than the Duke."
Frasier : Oh, all right!
-
Niles : So then it's possible these acts of aggression were misplaced outbursts aimed at your father.
Danny Kriezel : [crying] Yes!
Niles : He was the real bully, wasn't he?
Danny Kriezel : Oh, yes!
Niles : Let it out, Danny, let it out!
Danny Kriezel : Nothing I ever did was good enough for him! I am so sorry that I picked on you, man. I just wanted to be good at something, and I was good at that.
Niles : [puts his hand on Danny's shoulder] You were the best.
-
Danny Kriezel : Were you the kid who used to carry his gym shorts in an attache case?
Niles : It was a valise.
-
Niles : When you think about it, our only mistake today was trying to fix that toilet ourselves.
Frasier : Yes, we tampered with the natural order of things.
Niles : But now, order has been restored. By hiring a plumber, that plumber can now afford, say, a Dolly Parton album. Miss Parton can then finance a national tour which will, of course, come to Seattle, allowing some local promoter to make enough money to send his cross-dressing teenaged son to us for $150- an-hour therapy.
Frasier : [raises his glass] To the circle of life.
-
[Niles paces back and forth on Frasier's balcony, swatting Frasier's ficus plant every time he passes it]
Daphne Moon : What's Dr. Crane doing?
Frasier : He's a little frustrated because I wouldn't let him do something. He's taking his anger out on my ficus.
Daphne Moon : I've never seen him so angry, he's like a madman.
[Niles starts waving his arms around like a madman. Frasier lets him in]
Niles : Good Lord! There's a bee out there the size of a wood finch!
-
Niles : Good news, Frasier. I pulled some strings with the spa, and they're squeezing us in for a salt glow with our Swedish massage.
Frasier : Fabulous!
Martin Crane : Ah, forget about a plumber, I'll do it myself. My manicurist cancelled on me.
Frasier : Dad, you will not do it yourself.
Martin Crane : I'll bet you don't even have any tools around here.
Frasier : Oh well, that's where you're wrong. Let me show you something, mister. Here...
[He opens a drawer and pulls out a pocket toolkit]
Frasier : See this? Every possible tool for every possible need. Got this from Hammacher-Schlemmer.
Niles : Is that turquoise inlay?
Frasier : Yes, it also comes in ebony and onyx.
Niles : Onyx. Onyx is so showy. I don't...
Frasier : Oh, I don't think so. I love onyx, onyx is a stone that resonates within me...
[they begin to argue]
Frasier : Martin: This is why I never took any home movies. You two realize what a couple of delicate doilies you are? Sheesh, you don't even know the meaning of the word self-reliant. Thank God there's not a national disaster happening, you'd be helpless.
[exits]
Frasier : Niles:
[examining the toolkit]
Frasier : Oh! A lemon zester!
Martin Crane : You two realize what a couple of delicate doilies you are? Sheesh, you don't even know the meaning of the word self-reliant. Thank God there's not a national disaster happening, you'd be helpless.
[He exits]
Niles : [examining the toolkit] Oh! A lemon zester!
-
Frasier : Niles, I have to be honest. I'm a little disappointed in you. Were you actually going to stick another human being's head into a toilet?
Niles : [trying to open a bottle of water] You don't seem to understand, I feel this *rage*! It's as if this *beast* has been awakened within me!
[hands the bottle to Frasier]
Niles : Could you get that for me?
