- Carmen Lopez: [with red highlights] How does my hair look?
- George Lopez: Like you fell asleep in ketchup.
- George Lopez: Angie, the boy came in with his pants already half down, if he trips, they could have sex by accident.
- George Lopez: [about Carmen] How could she say I'm the worst dad ever? I mean there's O.J., and... Macaulay Culkin's dad is still out there.
- Carmen Lopez: [sitting in the yard wearing shower caps] We're dyeing our hair, Dad.
- Benny: Yeah, so move out of the way, I need the sun to cook the juices and your big head is making an eclipse.
- George Lopez: [busting into the party] Where the hell is Carmen Lopez?
- Party Kid: Where in the world is Carmen *Sandiego*?