- Hogan has to save Klink when his account books at Stalag 13 aren't quite correct.
- Two weeks have already passed since seven POWs escaped from Stalag 5. The men, hidden all of that time in the tunnels of Stalag 13, are growing antsy and the failed escape attempt by one nearly exposes the entire Heroes' system. Only the quick thinking of Hogan and his bribery of Sgt Schultz was able to avert that disastrous outcome. The mass escape by these prisoners has created a tightening of security in and around all Stalags, thus putting a hold on moving the escapees to freedom. The following day, General Burkhalter brings Major Strauss, Commandant of Stalag 5, to Klink's office explaining to both officers that the Major will be assigned to Stalag 13 for training in the proper operation of a POW camp. Very quickly, Strauss discovers serious discrepancies in Klink's financial records and informs him that this information will be passed to Burkhalter. Now Hogan must find a way to free the seven men while saving Klink from a probable firing squad.—Harry Tumilson
- At the start, in Klink's quarters, Klink is giving Fraulein Sofia wine. Sofia is on the sofa, and Klink sits next to her. Klink says that today is their anniversary; they have known each other for one month now. He gives her a necklace, comments about her eyes, and then kisses her. Out in the compound, there is machine gun fire, and Schultz catches a man (who is not a regular prisoner of STALAG 13) trying to escape. (Shultz does not recognize him as not being a prisoner there.) Hogan comes up and says that he was just airing his blanket. The man is one of the 7 who broke out of STALAG 5 a few days before; he has been there long enough and wants to get out. Hogan says that he almost blew the operation there. Down in the tunnel, LeBeau was trying to keep the 7 escapees entertained, but he says that they do not like his Maurice Chevalier imitation. Kinch suggests Betty Grable. LeBeau pulls up his pants legs. Kinch, after seeing LeBeau's legs, tells LeBeau to stick with Chevalier.
The next day, a staff car enters STALAG 13, with General Burkhalter and a Major Strauss, who is Kommandant of STALAG 5. Hogan does not recognize the major, so he goes to Klink's office, and asks Hilda who he is. He hisses her and gives her stockings to get the information.
Inside Klink's office, Burkhalter tells Klink and Strauss that there have been many escapes from prison camps in the area. They have to keep the 14th Division pinned down trying to find them, rather than sending the division to the Russian Front. There was a recent escape from STALAG 5, which Strauss commanded; Klink has had no escapes, ever. Burkhalter says that Strauss is to stay at STALAG 13, and observe how things are done. Strauss does not like it, and subtly insults Klink. Klink does not like the idea either. Burkhalter tells Strauss that Klink is his superior officer, and to treat him with respect; the alternative is the Russian Front. When Klink objects, Burkhalter says that he will go to the Russian Front also, on the same train; the only argument will be who gets which bunk.
Back in the barracks, Kinch gets a message saying that Dusseldorf was bombed, and a plane was shot down. Of the 12 airmen, 8 were captured and 4 are coming to STALAG 13. Hogan tells Newkirk and Carter to go out and meet them at point X14. Newkirk and Carter go out in commando black, and bring them in that night.
The next day, Klink and Strauss are walking in the compound, talking about Klink's philosophy at STALAG 13; Klink uses an iron fist with a velvet glove. Klink says that his success is an open book. Strauss wants to look at the books.
Strauss and Schultz are in an office looking over papers. Strauss asks Schultz if he has known Klink a while; Schultz says that Klink raised him from a private. When looking at the books, Strauss says that Klink borrowed money from a fund to transport prisoners to church services in town. Schultz laughs; he says that Klink puts that in there when he borrows money for his girlfriend. Schultz says that he is in love with Sofia Lindemann, a 'local tomato'. Strauss also notes 5000 marks to entertain Field Marshall Goring, and asks Schultz if he met Goring when he was here. Schultz says yes, as the 'Goring' mentioned is Fraulein Lindemann. Schultz asks Strauss if he has everything he wants, and Strauss says that he has more than enough. Strauss slyly smiles.
Later in Klink's office, Klink tells Strauss about the motor-pool. Strauss asks about Goring, asking about caviar and champagne. Klink hesitates. Strauss wants to meet Fraulein Lindemann. Strauss will testify at Klink's court martial regarding misappropriation of funds. Strauss refers to Stalingrad, unless Burkhalter prefers the firing squad.
Back in the barracks, Hogan says that he can't get the prisoners out. Carter suggests a clean-up detail, where they get away while outside the wire; Hogan says that he will ask Klink.
Hogan goes to Klink's office about the detail. Klink is perturbed that Strauss went through the books and found about him using the funds for Sofia. He thinks that he will get the firing squad; Strauss will report this to Burkhalter. Hogan tells Klink about prisoners escaping from STALAG 5. He says that Klink can capture the prisoners, and make a deal with Strauss, to forget about Fraulein Lindemann in exchange for the prisoners.
Later in the compound, Klink and Strauss are talking, and shake hands. Klink comes to the barracks to talk with Hogan. Hogan asks him what happened. Klink is hemming and hawing about the discussion. Hogan says that he saw them shake hands; Klink then admits that they made a deal. Klink asks Hogan when the prisoners will appear; Hogan says 'soon'. Klink wants more information; Hogan says 'Would you rather see sleigh bells coming toward you?'
Hogan tells Kinchloe to get a truck; Kinch already has the keys for it. Hogan tells the escaped prisoners the plan, and asks if anyone speaks German. One answers in German that he speaks and understands German. Hogan has something special in mind for him to do. After hearing the plan, Carter wants to vote on it; Hogan just wants to get them home. Shortly later, some of the prisoners put on German army uniforms, two with corporal stripes.
Seven prisoners, the ones who escaped from STALAG 5, surrender at the front gate to STALAG 13. Schultz lets them in. Strauss tells Klink that he kept his part of the bargain, so Strauss will keep his. Strauss asks Klink where he found the prisoners; Klink does not answer, and asks 'Would you rather see sleigh bells coming toward you?'
Just then, a truck comes in; the guards in the truck are the other 4 airmen who were shot down. The officer in the truck says that he is there to take them back to STALAG 5. Strauss asked how he knew they were there; the officer says that they got an 'anonymous phone call'. Strauss looks at Klink, thinking he made the call, and asks if he mentioned his name to Burkhalter. Strauss wants to take the men back himself; the officer tries to talk him out of it. Hogan suggests to the officer that he take Strauss with them, 'all the way'; smiling coyly when saying 'all the way'. The officer agrees; Strauss gets in the front seat, and the officer gets in the back of the truck. After the truck leaves, Klink asks Hogan why he did what he did. Hogan says that he wants to win the war; with Klink alive and fighting, they have a better chance.
At the end, Klink is in his quarters, on the sofa with Sofia. Hogan comes in, and offers himself some champagne. Klink says that Strauss disappeared with the prisoners; they don't know what happened. Just then, there is some gunfire heard; Klink leaves. Hogan says that they boys really know how to create a diversion, and then sits with Sofia. Hogan asks her 'Has anyone told you about your eyes?' She responds that yes, Klink has. Hogan then says 'Then let me tell you about your lips', and kisses Sofia.
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