- Col. Wilhelm Klink: Now, is there anything I can get you, General, before you go to sleep - perhaps a glass of warm milk?
- General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Warm milk?
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: Ah, I always have a glass before bedtime makes me sleep like a baby.
- General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Take my word, Klink, this is no time to be a sound sleeper.
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: Oh, I appreciate your concern, General, but I can assure you, you need not worry about my life being in danger.
- General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: I'm not worried about your life. If they get you, I am next.
- Janine Robinet: Mama Bear, we cannot find "cuckoo clock" in the code book.
- Kinchloe: Quiche Lorraine, it's not in the code book. We're talking about a real Hammelburg cuckoo clock.
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: If I don't watch them, these guards will steal everything.
- [guard turns his machine gun toward Klink]
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: Not you, Hans.
- Col. Hogan: My high school French tells me you just got her name and phone number.
- LeBeau: We French people always mix a little business with pleasure.