- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: You will all stay away from that rocket. Did you hear me? What is going on there? Back, back, all of you. Back!
- General von Rauscher: Who are you?
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Major Hochstetter, Herr General, in charge of security here, and you're all much too close to this rocket.
- General von Rauscher: My dear Major, there is no danger of it firing...
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Firing? Who's worried about firing? I'm worried about spying.
- General von Rauscher: Are you aware that I am in charge of this project, and that this is the inventor?
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: [Zagoskin hands him his notebook] Until I clear you, you will please stop inventing.
- [points at Marya]
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Who is that woman?
- General von Rauscher: She is my interpreter, Hochstetter.
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: Yes, Major Hochstetter. And I believe a full corporal.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: What is this bungler doing here?
- General von Rauscher: Responsible for the security of our witness.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: *I am responsible for security here!* What witness?
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: Hi there.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: What is this man doing here?
- General von Rauscher: Hochstetter, I am in charge of this project. And I am operating *under direct authority of the German General Staff*.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Traitors, all of them. What is this man doing here?
- General von Rauscher: I *am in charge of security*...
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: *What is this man doing here?*
- General von Rauscher: He is our witness.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Witness? You have chosen the most dangerous man in all of Germany as a witness. The Gestapo is taking over. I will surround this camp with a ring of steel. Anyone within a hundred yards of this rocket will be shot and reshot.
- [last lines]
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Berlin is calling every minute. "What happened to the Duke of York?" NOTHING IS WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DUKE OF YORK!
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: Bad scene, Major.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Hogan, I will not go down alone. If my head is to roll, all heads will roll.
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: Except, Major, I quite clearly had no part in this whole affair. Therefore...
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: All heads will roll!
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: All heads will roll, that's quite democratic.
- Marya: Poor Putzie. So handsome and so unlucky.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Traitors, all of you. I fully intend... Hogan, why are you so composed?
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: Well, it's obvious, Major. You've already figured how to turn this to your advantage.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: I have?
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: He has?
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: Of course. The ultimate weapon didn't quite work out. But the Major has a plan to cripple the entire Russian rocket program.
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: He has?
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Go on, Hogan.
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: You're pulling my leg. You're not arranging right now for Zagoskin to escape to Russia? Of course you are. He'll do for them what he's done for you. That's worthy of Himmler himself, Major.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Hogan, I...
- Marya: Major Hochstetter is a genius, Putzie. He has saved us all.
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Ja, I believe I have.
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: You're still going to send me home, aren't you?
- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Of course not. Take him away, Klink. Back to Stalag 13.
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: Schultz, take him away.
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: Cruel, sir, cruel.
- Marya: Sensational.
- Col. Robert E. Hogan: Adequate.
- General von Rauscher: Hogan, did you know the war is over?
- Col. Wilhelm Klink: The war is over?
- Sgt. Schultz: Who won?