"Home Improvement" Fifth Anniversary (TV Episode 1994) - Tim Allen as Tim Taylor

Tim : For men, there are two kinds of vegetables: your beans and your potatoes. I had my beans yesterday.

Al : I know.
Tim : And remember, if your drill says Binford... GET OUTTA THE HOUSE. TOOLS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO TALK.
Tim : And now, the moment we've all been waiting for: the introduction of the Man's Kitchen. A guy's galley. I am man, hear me roast.

[grunts]

Al : Well, Tim, what do you say we start'er up?

Tim : That's right. Only kitchen I know that has an ignition system.

[flicks some switches and turns the key. SFX: engine won't start]

Tim : Come on, come on.

Al : Maybe we should get jumper cables, hook it up to another kitchen.

Tim : Think I got it.

[tries again. Man's Kitchen activates]

Tim : Listen to that baby pur.
Tim : Can't wait for those endless seconds on a microwave. That's why we got the Binford Macrowave. 3 convenient power settings: High, Really high, and Split your own atoms.
Tim : [Cooks the potatoes in the Binford Macrowave] Once they stop glowing, they're probably ready to eat.
Tim : What does every man really dream about having in a refrigerator, Al?

Al : That's simple, Tim, a butcher.

[opens the refrigerator doors to reveal Benny the butcher]
Tim : Your dad didn't show, Mario, where's he?

Michael Andretti : Yeah, Dad couldn't come. He's racing his race car. but I brought somebody just as old.

Johnny Rutherford : I believe I beat you here from the airport, kid.

Michael Andretti : That's 'cause I used Tim's directions.

Tim Allen: Tim Taylor