Home Improvement (TV Series)

Nothing More Than Feelings (1991)

Tim Allen: Tim Taylor

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tim : It's a warning light; didn't it occur to you there might be a little problem?

  Jill : I thought if there was a problem with the car that the light would get brighter, or there would be a buzzer.

  Tim : A buzzer? It's a car, not a game show.

• Jill : What, do you have rocks in your head? Don't you think?

  Tim : Let's talk about who doesn't think for a minute - who drove around for two days with the oil light on?

  Jill : Wait - I thought you said you weren't going to bring up the oil light.

  Tim : With all those rocks in my head, sometimes I don't know *what* I'm sayin'!

• Tim : When the car doesn't get the oil that it needs, it tends to seize up into a rock.

  Jill : Are you saying the car's not running?

  Tim : We now own a 4000-pound 4-door boulder.

  Jill : You mean I can't drive it?

  Tim : Not unless you're Wilma Flintstone.

• Jim : The other day, I come home and there's my wife, out in the garage.

  Tim : Where she doesn't belong.

  Jim : And she's... she's prying the lid off a gallon can of paint with my 3/8-inch skew chisel.

  Tim : And they wonder why we die first.

• Tim : My wife drools in her sleep. I'm not talking a little puddle. I'm talking about hook up the hose, let's water the lawn.

• Al Borland : We only have a few minutes left.

  Tim : Al, we're having an important discussion here.

  Al Borland : About drool, Tim?

• Tim : I was thinking about what you said in the garage about that drool thing and you were right. I overstepped my bounds and I was really insensitive... You notice, I paused there in case you want to say "I forgive you, Tim."

• Jill : What does my drool have to do with home improvement?

  Tim : Well, no one likes to live in a damp house.

• Tim : You know why I like tools? Because they fix things - you tear down a motor, see the problem, it's right there - boom; it's fixed. I wish I could fix things between us that easily.