Home Improvement (TV Series)

Whose Car Is It Anyway? (1996)

Patricia Richardson: Jill Taylor

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tim : [Upon seeing Jill's new car]  It's British.

  Jill : It's a 1967 Austin Healy.

  Tim : I know what the heck it is. I don't know anything about British cars.

  Jill : That was a big selling point.

  Tim : These things require constant attention, honey.

  Jill : I know. I was thinking I could learn about the car and maybe do some of the work myself.

  [Tim bursts out laughing] 

• Tim : Can I have the keys, please?

  Jill : What for?

  Tim : I want to take it for a little drive and see what kind of trouble you got yourself in.

  Jill : You put down my car, you put me down for buying my car, and you expect me to hand over the keys so you can take it for a drive and tell me what else is wrong with it?

  Tim : It's a thought.

• Tim : I'm addicted to cars.

  Jill : Well, *duh*.

  Tim : I'm thinking of checking into the Henry Ford Clinic.

• Tim : [Upset over Jill's new car]  It's a shocker. I don't know what to say.

  Jill : How about saying that you're really happy that I got the car I wanted?

  Tim : Alright, I... I'm... IT'S BRITISH. These people made a fighter plane out of wood. They put kidneys in pies for God's sakes.

• Jill : [furious about Tim's having driven her car, but not wanting to have a total maniacal meltdown in front of the children]  Boys - - OUT!

  Jill : [sons scramble out of the room, Tim starts to saunter out, as well]  Tim - - IN!

• Jill : [barely holding in her maniacal rage upon discovering that Tim had driven her Healley after she'd specifically forbidden him to, but not wanting to vent her guts at Tim in front of their sons]  Boys - - OUT!

  Jill : [seeing Tim trying to slip out the door, as well, to hopefully avoid experiencing the brunt of Jill's wrath, as well]  Tim - - IN!

• Tim : How do we know you didn't get a lemon?

  Jill : [reassuringly]  No, no. I had it checked out by a British mechanic.

  Tim : [sarcastically]  A **British** mechanic? What did he say - - it was "ducky"?

  Jill : [indignantly]  Nigel went over this car bumper to bumper. He said it was in great mechanical shape, and I got a great deal.