The Honeymooners (TV Series)

'Twas the Night Before Christmas (1955)

Art Carney: Ed Norton

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ed Norton : Well, let's face it, Ralph. You're not the easiest guy in the world to shop for, you know? It's pretty tough to get a guy something that, well, a guy that's got everything.

• [Ralph's gift from Norton is a pair of spats] 

  Ralph Kramden : I know it came from your heart.

  Ed Norton : No, it didn't, it came from the fat man shop.

• Ed Norton : [to Ralph]  Compared to you, Scrooge was a holiday playboy.

• [Ralph shows Norton his present to Alice, a box to keep hairpins in] 

  Ralph Kramden : You know, when I bought this thing, the guy told me it's all handmade, you know. It's 2,000 matches glued together.

  Ed Norton : Oh.

  Ralph Kramden : Look at that thing. And he said it was made across the seas. You know, I thought he was kidding me, but right there, it says, "Made in Japan".

  Ed Norton : [looking at it]  There it is, in black and white. I'm telling you, this is something that a girl would not go out and buy for herself.

  Ralph Kramden : You can say that again. And another thing about this, the guy told me that this is the only one of these in the whole world, that at one time, this was in the house of the Emperor of Japan. It was smuggled into this country.

  Ed Norton : No kidding!

  Ralph Kramden : I'm telling you, I just can't wait to see the expression on her face when she gets this.

  Ed Norton : I'd like to see the expression on the Emperor of Japan's face when he finds out it's missing!

• [Ralph tells Norton that he hid Alice's present under the icebox; Norton goes looking for it and finds the pan underneath] 

  Ed Norton : That is beautiful, Ralph. I mean it. You know something else? You know, it was a smart idea of yours to put that underneath there, because in case accidentally if she goes in there and finds it, she'll just think it's a pan for under the icebox. It's novel, too, you know. I mean, she's not gonna get another present from anyone like this. She couldn't.

  Ralph Kramden : No one would have a need for two of those.