House M.D. (TV Series)
Maternity (2004)
Hugh Laurie: Dr. Gregory House
Quotes
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Dr. Gregory House : [clinic patient is unaware she is pregnant; House tells her she has a parasite] Don't worry. Many women learn to embrace this parasite. They name it, dress it up in tiny clothes, arrange playdates with other parasites.
Jill : Playdates?
Dr. Gregory House : [shows her the ultrasound] It has your eyes.
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Dr. James Wilson : I'm still amazed you're actually in the same room with a patient.
Dr. Gregory House : People don't bug me until they get teeth.
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Dr. Gregory House : Get up. We're going hunting.
Dr. Eric Foreman : For what?
Dr. Gregory House : Wabbits.
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Dr. Allison Cameron : Needle in a haystack.
Dr. Gregory House : It's worse than that. We don't even know it's a needle we're looking for.
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Dr. Gregory House : The most successful marriages are based on lies. You're off to a great start.
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Dr. Gregory House : How's Cameron?
Dr. Eric Foreman : Dr. Cameron?
Dr. Gregory House : Sure. Let's start with her and then move on to all the other Camerons we know.
Dr. Eric Foreman : I'm sorry. I'm just not used to you asking about someone's well-being.
Dr. Gregory House : I can understand how the question would surprise you. I didn't quite get how it would confuse you.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Why do you wanna know?
Dr. Gregory House : Why do you wanna know why I wanna know?
Dr. Eric Foreman : Just... curious.
Dr. Gregory House : Me, too.
Dr. Eric Foreman : You don't get curious.
Dr. Gregory House : I'm the most curious man in the world.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Not about trivialities.
Dr. Gregory House : Well, then, this must not be trivial.
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Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Two sick babies is very sad, but it doesn't prove an epidemic.
Dr. Gregory House : How many do?
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Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Happy now?
Dr. Gregory House : No, but I am interested.
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Hospital Attorney : My job is to protect this hospital. So I strongly advise you to come up with a medical rationale why Baby A should get medicine X, and vice versa.
Dr. Gregory House : Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on there slick. We didn't all go to law school. Your advice is that I should use medical reasons to make medical decisions? Mm, that's not gonna be as easy...
Hospital Attorney : Any medical justification. Doesn't need to be a good one.
Dr. Gregory House : Well, Hartig sounds Jewish, so does Aztreonam. So we'll take the Hartig kids off Vancomycin. How's that?
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[last lines]
Dr. Lim : [entering] Hey, seriously man, you're not supposed to be here.
Dr. Gregory House : [slouched in a lounge chair] I'm performing a delivery.
Dr. Kubisak : You are?
Dr. Gregory House : A patient whose prenatal care I've been handling. Just took her on a couple minutes ago. Of course, I'll need one of you two guys to supervise.
Dr. Lim : When is she due?
Dr. Gregory House : Late March.
Dr. Kubisak : That's five months from now.
Dr. Gregory House : [big grin] Thank God these chairs are comfortable.