How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)
The Sweet Taste of Liberty (2005)
Josh Radnor: Ted Mosby
Photos
Quotes
-
Ted : My friend does this thing where he goes to the airport and leaves fake luggage in order to meet women. That's all. That's all this is.
Officer McNeil : Nobody's that lame.
Ted : He is! He is that lame. Barney, tell him you're that lame!
Barney : We are international businessmen!
Ted : [to Barney] Oh, come on!
-
Ted : And so I licked the Liberty Bell.
Laura : How did it taste?
Ted : Like freedom... no, actually it tasted like pennies.
Laura : My God. Did you guys really do that?
Older Ted : We really did. And that was when I realized why I hung out with Barney. I never got where I thought I wanted to go, but I always got a great story.
-
Ted : Wait, so when you said we were going to pick someone up at the airport you meant you were going to pick someone *up* at the airport?
-
Barney : Ted, get in the cab. Marshall, you too.
Marshall Eriksen : Uh, I wish I could but I think me and Lily...
Barney : I understand.
[to Ted]
Barney : Come on!
Ted : Why can Marshall say no?
Barney : Uhh, because he's getting laid.
Marshall Eriksen : [to Ted] Consistently.
-
[leaving Philadelphia]
Barney : Coulda licked the Liberty Bell.
Ted : We're going to the airport.
Barney : ...Bong... Bong... Bong...
Ted : Why do I hang out with you? Why? All I wanted was to have a regular beer at my regular bar with my regular friends in my regular *city!*
Barney : [trying to force Ted to make eye contact] Ted! Ted! Ted! You're not even looking, are you?
Ted : No I am not.
Barney : Ted! Look: our forefathers died for the pursuit of happiness! Not the "sit-around-and-wait" of happiness! Now if you want, you can go to the same bar, drink the same beer, talk to the same people every day, *or*, you can *lick* the Liberty Bell! You can grab life by the crack and lick the crap out of it!
Leonard - Cab Driver #2 : That was beautiful, man.
-
Ted : Why can't we go to MacLaren's?
Barney : MacLaren's is boring. Let's go to the strip clubs. We're gonna meet some ladies. Phone five!
[high fives the phone]
Older Ted Mosby : I had no idea why I hung out with Barney.
Barney : You didn't phone-five did you, Ted? I know when you don't phone-five, Ted.
Ted : Come on, MacLaren's is fun.
Barney : [motioning with his hand] MacLaren's is THIS much fun. But what I'm offering is the chance to have *THIS* much fun!
Ted : [also using his hands] See, you always say that, you always say it's gonna be *THIS* much fun, but it always ends up being THIS much fun. This much fun is good. It's safe.
Barney : This whole hand signal thing doesn't really work over the phone, does it?
Ted : No, it doesn't.
-
Barney : [on the phone, sitting in a taxi] Come on! We always go to MacLarens.
Ted : [walking down the street] Yeah. Because MacLarens is fun.
Barney : MacLarens is *this* much fun
[holds his hand at shoulder height]
Barney : What I'm offering, is the chance to have *this* much fun
[holds his hand over his head]
Ted : See. You say that. You say its gonna be *this* much fun
[holds his hand above his head]
Ted : but most of the time it ends up being *this* much fun
[hold his hand below his waist]
Ted : . This much fun is good
[holds his hand in the middle]
Ted : . Its safe. Its guaranteed.
Barney : This hand gesture thing doesn't really work on the phone, does it?
Ted : No, it doesn't.
-
Ted : The truth is, my friend he does this thing when he goes to airport with fake luggage to pick up girl and we followed them to Philadelpia, that's it, that's all this is...
Officer McNeil : Nobody's that lame !
Ted : Yes, he's that lame, tell him you're that lame !
Barney : We are international business man...
Ted : Oh, come on !
