- Maya: This is horrible. You guys don't understand. Last night was a disaster. I spent the entire evening staring out into a sea of angry flannel. What was I supposed to do?
- Elliot: Oh, I don't know. Call us all "vapid drones who worship at the altar of greed, lust and egotism".
- Dennis: Yeah. We don't make fun of your religion.
- Dennis: Elliot, can you get Nina off my back? She keeps bugging me about that stupid solvent.
- Elliot: Oh, there is no solvent. She was being such a pain that I told her water wouldn't wash it out. But it really will.
- Dennis: So you had Nina running all around town in gold paint? That is so wrong. Why didn't you tell me so I could enjoy it?
- Maya: Hello, all! My, what a beautiful morning.
- Jack: My, you're happy.
- Maya: And why wouldn't I be? When I woke up this morning, I looked up, and there was a bird in my window sill, and it was singing.
- Jack: Singing. That's nice.
- Maya: It gets better. I step out of my building, and a cab stops right in front of me. A clean cab with a nice driver.
- Jack: It doesn't get any better.
- Maya: Oh, but it does. I get to work, what do I see on the newsstand but the brand new issue of Blush Magazine, with my article on the cover? An article that took me four weeks to research. An article that I titled "The Lost Art of Listening", but that some one had changed to "Shut Up And Maybe He'll Love You." So thank you. Thanks for everything.
- Jack: You're welcome. I'm just happy to be part of your perfect morning.
- Maya: I was being sarcastic! I'm furious with you!
- Jack: Oh, well, I'd like to deal with this, but I have this thing in my keister.
- Stephanie Griffin-Cooper: Mr. Gallo, how do you explain that Blush Magazine is in a sexist time warp?
- Jack: Please, doll, call me Jack.
- Stephanie Griffin-Cooper: Isn't it true that Blush treats women as trophies?
- Jack: Nothing could be further from the truth.
- Nina: [steps in still wearing gold paint] Sorry, forgot my purse.
- Jack: I just realized I must say dozens of clever things every day.
- Dennis: Uh-huh?
- Jack: And that's where you come in. I want you to follow me around and write down all of my Galloisms.
- Dennis: Galloisms?
- Jack: You know, my verbal gems. My nuggets of wisdom.
- Dennis: Ooh, I'd better call Bic and tell them to make more pens.