- June Cleaver: [BMOC Duke Hathaway has appointed Wally to the school dance committee] Who are you taking to the dance?
- Wally Cleaver: If you're on the committee, you don't have to take anybody. You just spend the whole evening making the other guys have a good time.
- Ward Cleaver: Was that the Duke's idea?
- Wally Cleaver: Yeah. He's got everything all organized. He even appointed two fellas just to see that none of the other guys throw sandwiches.
- June Cleaver: Well, what's your job?
- Wally Cleaver: The Duke's gonna tell me today. He told me yesterday he was too busy to talk to me.
- Theodore Cleaver: Boy, when I get to High School, I'm not going to any dances - even if they would let me throw sandwiches.
- June Cleaver: Well, Beaver, one of these days you'll change your mind about girls, the way Wally did.
- Wally Cleaver: Gee Mom, I don't know if mine's changed all the way. There's an awful lot of girls that still give me the creeps.
- Ward Cleaver: Well, just hang on to that feeling as long as you can, son.
- Larry Mondello: What's the matter with your brother, Beaver?
- Theodore Cleaver: He's all messed up with girls. He can't get a blind date for one for a dance.
- Larry Mondello: I know how it is. My sister has trouble gettin' dates for dances and stuff.
- Theodore Cleaver: How come?
- Larry Mondello: 'Cause she's homely.
- Theodore Cleaver: Oh, that's right.
- Larry Mondello: But my mother and father are always hollerin' at her.
- Theodore Cleaver: Does that do any good?
- Larry Mondello: Well, if they holler enough, she gets a cousin or somethin' to take her.
- Larry Mondello: [later, Beaver and Larry are about to spy on Wally's blind date] Why does Wally want you to look at this girl?
- Theodore Cleaver: 'Cause he's takin' her to the dance, and he wants to know what she looks like.
- Larry Mondello: Oh. A fella once called me up and asked me what my sister looked like.
- Theodore Cleaver: Did you tell him?
- Larry Mondello: [horrified] *No!* She was sittin' right there!