M*A*S*H (TV Series)
That Darn Kid (1982)
G.W. Bailey: Sergeant Luther Rizzo
Photos
Quotes
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Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III : A hundred and forty... A hundred and fifty. There. Finished.
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : You're forgetting one thing, Major, that's just the interest. You still owe me the original 50.
Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III : Very well. 20, 40... 50. Wonderful. Now I'm out of cash again. How do you expect me to make it through to the end of the month?
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : With the help of a friend.
[Puts arm around Charles and grins]
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : Hi, friend.
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Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III : Would you like some cognac?
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : No thanks, I ain't hungry.
Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III : [clears throat] Ahem, Luther, I've brought you here to discuss an offer that you would be a fool - as it were, not to accept.
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : Oh yeah?
Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III : I've given it alot of thought and have come to the conclusion that in exchange for cancelling my debt, I am prepared to part with this.
[Unwraps a small blue vase]
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : What do I want with a pitcher?
Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III : This "pitcher" is an incredibly valuable and treasured vase from the Celadon Dynasty.
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : Oh...
[leans forward]
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : I don't care if it's from the new Sears catalog, Major. Just how stupid do you think I am?
Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III : An adjective fails me, but you see...
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : No, all I see is, is that YOU are tryin' to get out of payin' ME the money you owe me, which is $50...
[checks watch]
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : No no, make that a hundred dollars. I don't want no hard luck stories. I don't want no dime-store spitoons. All I want is my money. I'll see YOU tomorrow.
[Exits; Charles angrily throws the vase at the door, smashing it to pieces; Rizzo peers back inside]
Sgt. Luther Rizzo : Oh gee, sir, now you ain't got a pot to spit in.