Married... with Children (TV Series)

The Poker Game (1987)

Ed O'Neill: Al Bundy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lisa : No! Look, you don't seem to understand me. I need something that goes with this dress.

  Al : A bubbling cauldron?

  Lisa : You've got a lot of nerve.

  Al : I need it... to get this close to your feet.

• Al : Look, Steve. Why don't you do this? Go home, wake up Marcy and say, "Hey, I lost my money. I screwed up, it won't happen again, and what's for supper?" That's what being a man is all about, Steve. Making mistakes and not caring.

• Peggy : Oh, another fishing catalog. What am I looking at, Al? The apron that says, "He catches 'em, I cook 'em. He eats 'em, I love him"?

  Al : Nah, you'd wear it but you wouldn't mean it. No, I was talking about the five-and-a-half-foot meteor-graphite bait casting rod, with the high-speed star drag level wind reel.

  Peggy : [sarcastic]  Yippee skip! And a mere 275 dollars. Oh, Al, let's buy it. We can do without food and heat for a year.

  Al : [serious]  You wouldn't mind?

• Al : What's for supper?

  Peggy : Filthy pig!

  Al : We had that last night.

• Al : Now, I was off my game that night. I was nervous, I couldn't concentrate on my cards what with you being in the hospital having Bud and all.

• [first lines] 

  Peggy : Al, I'm doing the lottery. I need a number.

  Al : Twenty-three.

  Peggy : I don't like twenty-three.

  Al : Why? It was your waist size! Once!

  Peggy : Come on, Al, give me a real number.

  Al : Twenty-three is a real number. What have you got against twenty-three?

  Peggy : Well, you were born on the twenty-third, and we were married on the twenty-third.

  [Al glares at her coldly] 

  Al : Seventeen.

  Peggy : No, Kelly already picked seventeen. I need something closer to twenty.

  Al : [engrossed in reading catalog]  Yes, so do I.

  Peggy : Okay, fine, I'll pick it myself. But I'm telling you something, Al, when we win the thirty-eight million dollars, I am keeping every penny.