Mister Ed (TV Series)

Unemployment Show (1963)

Edna Skinner: Kay Addison

Quotes 

• Kay Addison : Careful, Roger! Don't slam the door.

  Roger Addison : Why? Your brother taking a nap?

  Kay Addison : No, I have his favorite cake in the oven, strawberry shortcake. I don't want any noise or vibration in the house for the cake might fall.

  Roger Addison : Great, strawberry shortcake for him. Girl Scout cookies for me.

• Roger Addison : Where is that loafing brother of yours? Did he bring my car back yet or did he sell it?

  Kay Addison : Doll, Ralph has had a lot of tough breaks and he needs us now. He's been unemployed for several years and he has no place to live. It's just until he gets back on his feet.

  Roger Addison : You know what his problem is? He's not cut out to be a press agent. He should take any job he can get as long as he's gainfull and legaly employed.

  Kay Addison : I don't agree with you. Someday he'll stumble upon some great big publicty stunt, and he'll be on his way.

  Roger Addison : Out of my house I hope.

• Roger Addison : [looks at a $40 parking ticket that Ralph got]  I am not paying this ticket.

  Ralph : Oh, brother-in-law, you don't want me to go to jail, do you?

  Roger Addison : You bet your sweet...

  Kay Addison : [cutting Roger off]  Doll!

  Roger Addison : Kay, I am not paying that parking ticket. Ralph got the ticket. Let him pay it himself from the money out of his unemployment check.

  Kay Addison : Absoulutely not! You heard the poor boy at how long he waited in line to collect it.

  Roger Addison : You are incredible... both of you! That't it! I'm going out to play golf.

  Kay Addison : You can't.

  Roger Addison : Why not?

  Kay Addison : I already promised Ralph that he could borrow your clubs this afternoon.

  Ralph : You can have them tomorrow, Roger.

  Roger Addison : Great! Now, I'll have to go shopping for new golf clubs!

• Roger Addison : [seeing Kay carring a serving tray]  What's this?

  Kay Addison : Ralph's breakfast.

  Roger Addison : At one in the afternoon?

  Kay Addison : Ralph only got up an hour ago. He didn't get much sleep for he was up most of the night.

  Roger Addison : Yeah, I know. I heard him. Running up and down the stairs to the refrigerator.

  Kay Addison : Give him a break. You know Ralph is a compulsive eater when he's not working.

  Roger Addison : If he doesn't get out of this house and go find a job, he's going to be a compulsive starver. Next to him, Mister Ed, that lazy horse of Wilbur's has had a job at the Tally Ho Stables for over a month now.

  Kay Addison : Are you comparing my brother to a horse?

  Roger Addison : Why not? He eats like one.