- Micky: Well, 'bye, Pete. Later, Pete. Listen, don't forget to write, Pete. And remember, the door's always open to ya, Pete! You can come home to the pad and all your frends! But write first, 'cause we're renting your room!
- Mike Nesmith: You know that after I quit the show, I'm gonna join The Byrds, don't ya?
- Frank Zappa: [laughs] No, I didn't know that.
- Mike Nesmith: When you quit the Mothers, who are you gonna join?
- Frank Zappa: I may join The Byrds, too.
- Mike Nesmith: Tell me, Frank Zappa, I've always wanted to have you to show me how to conduct, because I heard you were really spiffy at it.
- Frank Zappa: Will you follow me, then?
- Mike Nesmith: Why, you're on Television, I'm just one of the unpopular musicians. Teach me.
- Frank Zappa: No, it's the other way around. You're a popular musician, I'm dirty, gross and ugly.
- The Great Oracullo: Look into my eyes. Deeply, deeply, ever so deeply, yes... deeply, deeply, what do you see?
- Peter: Dishonesty, cowardice and a lack of scruples.
- The Great Oracullo: Too deep. Try again.
- The Great Oracullo: Oh Mr. Tork, why don't you join me in a cup of tea?
- Peter: Would you think we we'll both fit?
- The Great Oracullo: And now, Mr. Tork, you will do everything exactly as I have told you to do. First...
- Peter: [in a trance] First I will kill Oracullo.
- The Great Oracullo: [shocked] Who told you to do that?
- Peter: He who secretly hates Oracullo and hasn't the guts to tell him.
- Rudy Bayshore: For a psychic slave you got a big mouth!
- The Great Oracullo: The hiding place of a body is locked deeply into your unconsious. Now I want you to free your mind of all thought.
- [Mike takes a sip of his tea while pretendint to smoke a pipe]
- The Great Oracullo: Good Now, eh, how do you feel?
- Mike: [faking amnesia] Oh, ah, ehm, toughtless.
- The Great Oracullo: Hmm. Look deeply... deeply, deeply into my eyes. Now what do you see?
- Mike: Cowardice, and ehm, dishonesty, and a general lack of scruples.
- The Great Oracullo: [facing camera] Maybe there's something in what they say.
- Davy: It's no use, Micky, he won't budge.
- Micky: Well, we got to get him outta here before 'racullo gets back.
- Davy: [snaps fingers] I've got it: experimental psychology!
- Micky: [serious tone of voice] What's that? It sounds complicated!
- Davy: [hits Peter on the head with a big mallet] Actually, it's not.
- The Great Oracullo: [Peter has broken free from his chains on the wall by Oraculo's command]
- [disembodied voice]
- The Great Oracullo: You fool, that's not the way to the door!
- Peter: Well, what do you expect form a psychic slave?
- The Great Oracullo: Ah, you sir, may I ask, what is your occupation?
- Lawyer: Yes, I'm a lawyer.
- The Great Oracullo: A lawyer, oh, let me see what I can see for the future... Ah yes, your future is assured! At the age of twenty nine, you will be the youngest judge ever to sit on the Supreme Court!
- [audience applaudes]
- Lawyer: But I'm already thirty five...
- The Great Oracullo: Then you should have come to see me sooner.
- [audience boos]