The Nanny (TV Series)

The Facts of Lice (1997)

Daniel Davis: Niles

Quotes 

• Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock : [about Fran]  She thinks you're a killer. She even thought you were trying to kill me.

  Niles : Oh, I wouldn't even dream of touching you, like any other normal man.

• Fran Fine : I saw the list. You explain Secure Alibi.

  Niles : That was the title.

  Fran Fine : What about the morgue?

  Niles : I was doing research.

  Fran Fine : Well what about the bananas?

  Niles : I was making a pie!

  Fran Fine : ...Well where is it?

  Niles : Your mother was here.

• Niles : I'm glad we're alone.

  Fran Fine : Yeah. Just you, me, and that piercing voice that CARRIES TO THE NEIGHBOURS!

• Niles : Why can't I be more like him? I'm as smart as he is, as talented as he is. Who came up with this system of the haves and the have nots?

  Fran Fine : Uh, that would be the haves.