- Gomez Addams: Aah! Here it is.
- [holds up a script]
- Morticia Addams: [reading the title] "Death, Demise and Destruction", a romantic comedy by Gomez Addams.
- Gomez Addams: I wrote it when I had aspirations of being a playwright.
- Morticia Addams: Darling, what stopped you?
- Gomez Addams: No talent.