Night Court (TV Series)

Hurricane: Part 2 (1986)

Harry Anderson: Judge Harry T. Stone

Quotes 

• Christine Sullivan : [as one mother's baby is born]  Your Honor, look!

  Harry Stone : What is it, Miss Sullivan?

  June Wheeler : [to Bob about the judge]  Good Lord, he's a virgin!

• Man : Why is the sky blue?

  Harry Stone : Because if it was green, we wouldn't know where to stop mowing.

• Harry Stone : Mac!

  Court Clerk MacIntosh 'Mac' Robinson : Yo?

  Harry Stone : Get some bandages, blankets, cotton, and string! Miss Sullivan!

  Christine Sullivan : Sir!

  Harry Stone : What the hell am I gonna do with all that stuff that Mac brings?

• Harry Stone : Okay, settle down.

  [Banging gavel] 

  Harry Stone : Settle down! QUIET! QUIET! QUIET!

  [Courtroom quiets down] 

  Harry Stone : Now here's the situation: We have four women in active labor and we have lost all communication with the outside world. I want all non-court personnel OUT of here. Are there any questions?

  [Bum raises his hand] 

  Harry Stone : Yes.

  Man : Why is the sky blue?

  Harry Stone : Because if it was green, we wouldn't know where to stop mowing.

• Harry Stone : [in the courtroom, looking up at the cross-shaped basketball net]  Can we talk? As you probably know... I - I don't subscribe to any particular organized religion. But then maybe neither do you, huh? All right, I confess. I've had more than my share of spiritual doubt. But then I've see some pretty glaring examples of man's inhumanity to man come stomping through here night after night. After night. You remember that guy? Yeah. You remember everything, don't you? Well, I'm telling you, that one just about shook - shook my faith down to its foundation. And then... you drop a brand-new life right into my hands. Well, if I could just have the answer to a couple of questions. Like, if you've always been here, then where did you come from? And does man have the capacity to rid himself of his own evil? And why is the sky blue? Well, I can look that one up. But this baby stuff, boy... I'm telling you, that is not a cosmic accident. I mean, you gave us Mozart. Van Gogh. Confucius. Dr. Martin Luther King. And Larry Bird!

  [pulls a basketball out of his robe and tosses it into the net. SWISH] 

• Harry Stone : [Mac brings a marriage license for Chad and Babs and needs Harry to sign it. Harry is still delivering their baby]  Mac I am holding a fragile human life in my hands!

  [pause] 

  Harry Stone : Put the pen in my mouth.

  [he signs it] 

  Court Clerk MacIntosh 'Mac' Robinson : [reviewing the signature that should read 'Harry Stone']  Howie... Stallone?

• Florence Kleiner : Your Honor, I found a medical book. There's a chapter on emergency childbirth.

  Harry Stone : That's great! Make four copies of that and get them to everybody.

  Florence Kleiner : [turns away]  I'll get right on it.

  Harry Stone : Flo!

  Florence Kleiner : What?

  Harry Stone : What's the first thing it says to do?

  Florence Kleiner : [reads]  Uh, "keep the mother from panicking."

  [while his wife is in labor on the courtroom floor, Stanley lets out a howl of sheer panic, then his eyes roll up and he faints dead away beside her] 

  Florence Kleiner : God, let's hope they're all that considerate.

• Benet Collins : Hi, everybody. I'd like for all of you to say hello to my new son, Reinhold.

  Florence Kleiner : [with everyone puzzled]  Reinhold?

  Benet Collins : Uh-huh.

  Florence Kleiner : Reinhold?

  Benet Collins : Uh, were we interrupting something?

  Harry Stone : No, not at all. I was about to toast to your children. May they live long and prosper.

  All : [raising their glasses of Cherry Kool-Aid]  Cheers.

  Harry Stone : Ah, and now, if you will excuse me...

  Harry Stone : [stepping out into the hallway]  Reinhold?

  [grimacing in disbelief]