Night Court (TV Series)

No Hard Feelings (1987)

Elayne Boosler: Joy Buscaglia

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dan Fielding : Excuse me, anything for me?

  Joy Buscaglia : Yeah, your doctor phoned and said your tests came out negative.

  Dan Fielding : Are you sure?

  Joy Buscaglia : Hey, it's a poor musician who blames his instrument.

• Joy Buscaglia : Sullivan!

  Christine Sullivan : Yes, right here!

  Joy Buscaglia : Your phone messages!

  Christine Sullivan : Oh, thank you.

  [takes them and stops] 

  Christine Sullivan : Uh, excuse me, these are in Braille.

  Joy Buscaglia : [takes them back and slaps her hand on the first one]  Your father wants to know why you're avoiding him.

  [crumples it and slaps the next one] 

  Joy Buscaglia : Your singles club canceled the hayride because everybody else thought it was stupid.

  [crumples it and slaps the last one] 

  Joy Buscaglia : And some twerp named Rod phoned and said he can't wait to see his "Lammycakes" for some "smoochy-pie."

  Christine Sullivan : [embarrassed]  Gee, thanks.

• Joy Buscaglia : Hey, I'd love to stay and schmooze, but I can tell you two civic giants want to be alone. Maybe you can rub your skulls together and come up with a thought or something. Later.

  [she exits] 

  Cooper : You know, it's a shame we don't burn people at the stake anymore.

• Joy Buscaglia : Now listen, up, 'cause I'm only gonna say this once. My name is Joy Buscaglia, I touch-type sixty words a minute, take dictation from transcription, and I'm fastest in the building at the Xerox machine - I don't have to close the lid. Now we're gonna have a few ground rules around here. One...

  [bangs her cane against the desk] 

  Joy Buscaglia : We don't move the furniture around. Two: no sneaking up on me! And three: I don't like chit-chat. Do not ask how I am. I'M BLIND! That's how I am.