The Office (TV Series)

Pilot (2005)

Rainn Wilson: Dwight Schrute

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dwight Schrute : Damn it! Jim! He put my stuff in Jell-O again.

  [Points to Michael] 

  Dwight Schrute : You can be a witness. Can you reprimand him, please?

  Jim Halpert : [eating Jell-O]  How do you know it was me?

• Dwight Schrute : Downsizing? I have no problem with that. I have been recommending downsizing since I first got here. I even brought it up in my interview. I say, bring it on.

• [Jim sets a fence of pencils up between Dwight and his desk] 

  Dwight Schrute : You can't do that.

  Jim Halpert : Why not?

  Dwight Schrute : Safety violation. I could fall and pierce an organ.

  Jim Halpert : We'll see.

• Dwight Schrute : [deleted scene]  Dwight Schrute. My father's name, also Dwight Schrute. My grandfather's name, Dweide Schrude, Amish. That's my family. I don't know where they came, the Amish, came from originally. Uh, Amland.

  Michael Scott : [holding up a Dundie and pretending it is talking]  Hello. I'm Michael Scott. I'm the best boss in the world.

  Jim Halpert : My name is Jim Halpert and I am a sales rep, which is a very important job. Um, without me dozens, literally dozens of small businesses would go paperless. They would have to write on their hands, or bed sheets, or who knows, you know. Total chaos, total chaos. I mean... or they could get their paper somewhere else. Staples maybe. I don't know.

• Dwight Schrute : [deleted scene]  People respond to the human touch and that's what I give them. I can look at a client and I can say, "Hello, how are you? How's business been going?" And we can go back and forth for sometime and uh, then I'll say, How much, how many reams do you want?" And they'll order it and then I'll take care of all the sales. I'll make sure that they get that paper. And they appreciate that.

• Documentary Crew Member : [deleted scene, boom microphone drops into the camera shoot]  Can you move it out? Can you move it? Is that all right? Can you make that work?

  Dwight Schrute : That's fine.

  Documentary Crew Member : [new take]  No, you don't even need... That's fine. We'll keep it...

  Dwight Schrute : I'm sorry. It makes me nervous.

  Documentary Crew Member : Understood, but it is what we need to capture what you're saying as clearly as possible.

  Dwight Schrute : I understand. It's in a blind spot because I'm trained in several martial arts and one of them, uh, includes, uh, an awareness that the masters bring, uh, of anything on all sides of you. It could be behind you or whatever. This is directly in a blind spot, so I'm trained to respond negatively to something right above my head.

  [new take] 

  Dwight Schrute : This now I have an eye on. You see, it's on my periphery and if I needed to block it, attack it, stop it somehow.

  [does a martial arts move with his hands] 

  Dwight Schrute : I could come right out. I mean, I know you're doing your job, but...

  Documentary Crew Member : [talking over Dwight]  It's...

  Dwight Schrute : I'm doing my job.

• Dwight Schrute : It's okay here, uh, but people sometimes take advantage, because it's so relaxed. And, I'm a volunteer sheriff's deputy on the weekends, and you cannot screw around there. It's sort of one of the rules.