- Larry Appleton: Say Chuck, do you have a blueprint for your brain? I'm building an idiot!
- Balki Bartokomous: [in a hurt tone] Cousin, you didn't tell me you were building an idiot!
- Larry Appleton: It was going to be a surprise.
- Larry Appleton: You know what really makes me angry is that there is nothing guys like you and me can do about guys like Chuck.
- Balki Bartokomous: Now you know, I'm not sure I agree with you. What about David and Goliath? What about Jack and the beanstalk? What about the Captain and Tennille?
- Larry Appleton: You know, Balki, these sneak attacks have really sharpened my reflexes. My senses have been honed to a razor's edge.
- Balki Bartokomous: Yeah, you could cut your toenails on my senses, too.