Primetime Glick (TV Series)

George Wendt/Chevy Chase (2001)

Martin Short: Jiminy Glick, Miss Gathercole, Various

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jiminy Glick : Before you go, do a little Jiminy Cricket for us.

  Chevy Chase : Boy, I haven't been asked to do that in a long time. Are you ready?

  Jiminy Glick : Well, after we see it, we'll know why.

• George Wendt : No more notes!

  Jiminy Glick : Fine. Just one: Try playing it like a MALE this time.

  George Wendt : I'll kill you!

  [choking Jiminy Glick] 

  George Wendt : Die, piglet, die!

• Jiminy Glick : You went to Massatusetts Institute to Technology.

  Chevy Chase : Yes, that's correct.

  Jiminy Glick : Did you ever run into Ted Kennedy?

  Chevy Chase : Yes, I did. But much later than that.

  Jiminy Glick : Was he drunk? Stumbling, with a big bulbous nose, saying, "I, uh, would like, uh, some, uh, young girls?"

  [laughs] 

  Chevy Chase : [laughs]  He gets made fun of like that.

  Jiminy Glick : Those Kennedy boys are... do you think there's a curse on the Kennedy boys?

  Chevy Chase : I hope not, because they're friends of mine, and if this airs... you're finished.

• Jiminy Glick : Then you made all these movies, these wonderful movies, Chevy Chase, and you became a multi-multi-multi-thousandaire, by doing such films as "All of Me". What was your favorite film?

  Chevy Chase : [clears throat]  What?

  Jiminy Glick : What was your favorite film?

  Chevy Chase : That I made, you mean.

  Jiminy Glick : Yes.

  Chevy Chase : Ah! Uh, "¡Three Amigos!".

  Jiminy Glick : [delighted]  "¡Three Amigos!"! And why was that?

  Chevy Chase : Well, because I had one really good comedian, uh, in it with me.

  Jiminy Glick : Steve Martin?

  Chevy Chase : Yes.

• Jiminy Glick : When we went looking for someone to play the role of me in the Lifetime Channel's "Jiminy Jiminy", we went through so many names. And so many actors said, "Not on your life." And then, I think it was right after Jan Michael Vincent took a pass, I think it was then, when someone suggested George Wendt. And it was like, "Oh my God, how brilliant!" Because, A: We knew he'd be available, and two: I think he's one of the greatest actors that's living, certainly, well anyway, ladies and gentlemen, the great George Wendt!

  [George Wendt comes on stage to band music; Jiminy bows but has trouble getting up. George helps him up] 

  George Wendt : You BETTER get down on your knees. That was the worst introduction I've ever heard in my life!

  Jiminy Glick : Oh my God, it so came from the heart. I don't know what you mean.

  George Wendt : Well, it was just kind of, uh, nasty, presuming that I'd always be available.

  Jiminy Glick : Oh no no no no, it's just that sometimes... truth pops into my head, and like a fool, I state it.

• Jiminy Glick : [on his biopic "Jiminy Jiminy"]  It's just a lot of lies.

• Jiminy Glick : I'm a late night snacker. That's what does me. I, I can fast all day, I can fast from 8 pm to 8:30, and before I know it, it's bologna sandwiches! One with a little ketchup, one with a little mustard!