- [Beverly and Roseanne are at Jackie's house. Bev is trying to comfort Roseanne]
- Jackie Harris: [to Roseanne] I didn't invite her. I left a window open, she just flew in.
- Mark Healy: Mr. Conner knows that you're not ready to go home yet, so he'd like to meet you on neutered territory.
- Dan Conner: I'm just dying to kiss you.
- Roseanne Conner: You think your heart can take it?
- Dan Conner: Well if not, it'll be a hell of a way to go.
- Beverly Harris: We should live together like the ladies in Sense and Sensibility, me and my spinster daughters!
- Roseanne Conner: You know, Mom... Lizzie Borden was a spinster.
- Beverly Harris: I'll pay you no mind, you're just dehydrated.
- Roseanne Conner: I can't get Dan out of my head.
- Jackie Harris: Well he's supposed to be in your head. He's your husband, you love him, he's supposed to be in your head!
- Roseanne Conner: He's in your TV too, you might want to check on that.
- Beverly Harris: [Jackie has told Bev about the lottery ticket she bought] Well, its nice you can still dream since reality has been so unkind.
- Dan Conner: I'm going to start taking better care of myself.
- Roseanne Conner: Good, because I'm really gonna yell at you if you don't.
- Dan Conner: Are you really gonna yell at me... from here, or from Jackie's?
- Roseanne Conner: Well... it's more fun here.
- Beverly Harris: Happy Meals for everybody!
- David Healy: Oh, I love Happy Meals!
- Darlene Conner-Healy: Great, I'll strap you in your booster seat and we can count little red trucks on the way.